(Closed) Adding on his last name and keeping mine – as a last name or as a middle?

posted 7 years ago in Names
  • poll: which did you do?
    made it a middle name and have had no problems : (8 votes)
    67 %
    made it a middle name and ran into a problem/inconvenience : (1 votes)
    8 %
    made it a double last name and have had no problems : (2 votes)
    17 %
    made it a double last name and ran into a problem/inconvenience : (1 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    236 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012
    Post # 4
    Member
    1553 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I didn’t do this.  I dropped my maiden name totally, so my name is now Myfirst Mymiddle Hislast.  

    But if I hadn’t had a middle name, I’d definitely have moved my last name to the middle name slot and taken his name as my last name….Myfirst Maiden Hislast.  That way, I could use Myfirst Hislast socially and Myfirst Maiden Hislast professionally.  

    I think doing so is far less confusing to deal with than having two unhyphenated last names.  I have friends who have gone with two last names and they report that people sometimes add a hyphen anyway, assume the first last name is a middle name and misfile them, call their husband Mr. Herfirst Hislast….etc.  One of them even did a legal name change to move her maiden name to her middle name because of all the trouble she had with two last names.

    Post # 5
    Member
    5095 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    That is extremely common. When I was younger I actually thought that was what all women did, since my mom and most of my friends’ moms had done that. It’s never been a problem.

    I also have a friend who did the opposite – took her husband’s last name as her middle name, and kept her own last name. He did the same with hers.  It’s very sweet. 🙂 And it has not caused them any problems.

    Post # 6
    Member
    5095 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Oh wait, I think I read your question wrong. You’re asking if instead of writing your maiden name in the “middle name” slot, if you could put both names as your new last name?  I’m less sure about that – but it probably wouldn’t be a problem, since there are names like van Gogh, for instance, that are two words but one last name.

    Post # 7
    Member
    2465 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    i was going to add my last name as a middle name (and have 2 middle names, because my middle name was my mom’s maiden name), but NY law actually doesn’t let you change your middle name with just a marriage certificate–you need a court order. and after 4 hours of waiting at the DMV, i just wanted to get the name change done! so i have 4 names officially–2 last names with no hyphen. and i’ve had no problems at all. i like how flexible have both names is–i’m comfortable being referred to as both or either last name socially. my old boss also did this and has 2 last names, so i think i got the idea from her, but i love it, and i’m glad their both last and i didn’t move my maiden name to the middle.

    Post # 8
    Member
    2891 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I hated my middle name my whole life. I plan to keep my maiden name as my last name as everyone calls me by both my first and last name thinking it is one name. It would be pointless to try to drop my maiden name no one else will. I will just add my husband’s last name and finally “have” a last name lol. This can cause an issue on children’s birth certificates though as you are listed on those by your maiden name so the you could be listed as example Lindsay Porter Porter. This is fixable though if you are proactive. 🙂

    Post # 9
    Member
    2891 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    Oh one final thought: it needs to be done at the social security office first.otherwise it does take a court order but everyone follows what is on your social security card so no worries.

    Post # 10
    Member
    5885 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I moved my maiden to the middle (2 middle names now). I haven’t run into an major problems, but some places don’t let you have 2 middle names or 2 middle initials. So in some cases, my maiden name (or initial) get’s dropped.

    Post # 11
    Member
    4653 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Im planning on keeping my last name then just adding his last name no hyphen after mine. I want to keep my last name and want to use my last name still but want to still have his so this is my solution my kids have both our last names (his first mine second no hyphen) and we havent had any issue with there names!

    Post # 12
    Member
    1995 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    mine is First Maiden HisLast.  No problems whats so ever – granted it doesnt matter in my profession and I’m not published but still.

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