(Closed) Addressing envelopes

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
44 posts
Newbee

I’ve been switching it up (my inner feminist can’t stomach Mr and Mrs hisfirstnameonly at all!) so have consistently used all women’s first names as well as the men’s, and switched the order around each time (yes, totally inconsistent, but feels more ‘equal’ to me) eg. Mr. and Mrs. Hisfirstname and Herfirstname Theirlastname on some, and Mrs. and Mr. Herfirstname and Hisfirstname Theirlastname on others.  I’m sure some of the older traditionalists in my family will laugh, but they expect this type of thing from me 😉

Post # 4
Member
1061 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I also think "Mr. and Mrs. HisFirstName TheirLastName" is not so hot (though I have used it for older guests). I’ve been writing "Mr. and Mrs. HisFirstName and HerFirstName TheirLastName," but I’ve kept it as "Mr. and Mrs." Just seems strange to me to say "Mrs. and Mr." To make it seem a little more equal though, I’ve put the woman’s name first in the inner envelope "HerFirstName and HisFirstName."

If you are doing it the traditional way though ("Mr. and Mrs. HisFirstName TheirLastName"), why does it seem strange? If she took his name, that is the "proper" way to do it. 

Post # 5
Member
508 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

If you’re going Emily Post formal, then that is proper.  However, I’m with jlsween in my dislike for that format, especially if she’s the one who is your primiary invitee.  I’d do Mr. & Mrs. His First and HerFirst TheirLast.

While rebecca is right in that she took his name, she took his last name, not his first!

Another option would be to do without Mr & Mrs and just go with their names in a variety of formats:

His First and HerFirst Their Last

Her First and HisFirst TheirLast

HerFirst TheirLast & HisFirst Their Last 

You could also just put each of their names on a separate line.  This is how we’re treating our non-married couple friends who cohabitate. Pesky modern quandries!

Good luck! 

Post # 7
Member
508 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

It’s ticky, for sure!  My Future Sister-In-Law is addressing our invites and so a lot of this same stuff is coming up.  The details of wedding planning perpetually amaze me – who knew there was so very much to consider. 🙂

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