Advice – being a mom and a daughter

posted 5 days ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
806 posts
Busy bee

Like with friends, if you want to spend quality time with your parents, you’re going to have to divest yourself of the kids for a period of time.  Your partner (if you have one) can watch the kids, a close friend can watch the kids, a babysitter can watch the kids, or you can send them for a playdate with other neighborhood or school kids (not sure how possible this is with COVID) and spend time with your parents during that time.  You could also consider sending them to their other set of grandparents while you see your parents.

I’m sure your kids will want to see your parents too (their grandparents), so maybe it should sometimes be a quality outing for all three generations.

 

Post # 3
Member
3146 posts
Sugar bee

Are you asking about activities you could do with your toddlers and parents together? My parents live out of state but we visit each other fairly often and do lots of stuff together with our toddler (and now newborn). Most activities center on food/drink cuz that’s how we roll lol. If the weather is nice, we’ll go to a beer garden or outdoor restaurant (though that’s increasingly challenging with a wild 2.5 year old), or have a picnic at a park together so the toddler can run around. We’ve also done some family beach vacations which have been awesome! 

If you’re looking for kid-free options, you could have your spouse watch the toddlers while you do something with your parents, or have one parent watch the kids while you hang with the other. Or hire a sitter? Or do things during nap time (if they still nap) or after bedtime. 

ETA: Because we are long distance, we do a good amount of Facetime when we can’t be physically together. We talk every few days on FT and sometimes I’ll call with the kids so they can see their grandparents, but other times I deliberately call during their nap time or after bedtime so we can have an actual convo haha

Post # 4
Member
390 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I talk to my mom on the phone every morning. We get our alone time and get to chat about anything we want. Then we see them as a family (with my husband and toddler) every 1-2 weeks. We usually just get lunch with them at the house but sometimes we’ll go out to lunch, or go to a play place for the baby (Disney, splash pads, etc), or go to the cemetery to visit other family there. To be honest I haven’t had any real solo hang out time with them since my son was born but I’m okay with that and I think they are too. It’s their first grandchild and he is their everything, time is so precious and my dad isn’t doing the best so I want to be sure their relationship with my son is strong and has many happy memories. If I showed up at their house to visit without my son I assume I’d hear some silly joke about where their baby was. 😂

If you say most of the time you take your kids there is so they can babysit, maybe you need to find more family centric activities that you can all to together. Find a splash pad, and indoor playground, a park, a mall, go to lunch. I’m not sure about your vaccine status or current Covid situations, but we’re all vaccinated and needed to prioritize our mental health and family relationships while we still can with my dad, so we’ve been finding places we can all go together where we can socialize as adults but let the kid play and explore. 

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