(Closed) Advice, feeling out done.

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
8360 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Maybe her Fiance didn’t appreciate the talk you had with your sister (his FI) and felt that the reason they chose the date they did was none of your business 9and hence told you a BS story)!

Maybe they were reacting to your pettiness?


Post # 4
717 posts
Busy bee

no, she’s saying they announced it and then OP tried to talk to them.  

don’t let it get to you.  if she’s feeling insecure or trying to one-up you, let that be her problem.  you and your Fiance enjoy your engagement and plan the wedding you both want.  jealousy is ugly but what can you do?  maybe try talking to her when things settle down but your sister will just have to get over it

Post # 5
6998 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I don’t think you are being petty and I can understand your frustration. Honestly I would take the high road on this one. Talk to your mother about budget and if she is willing to help and plan your wedding regardless of what your sister is doing. Concetrate on you and Fiance only and what you two want for your wedding. I would just let it go and let her continue on with her antics. If you don’t let it bother you maybe she will stop trying to one up you. I’m sure its not easy for her knowing her sister is getting married just as its not easy for you trying to plan a wedding around a wedding that may or may not be happening. Right now is the time to focus on you and your Fiance. Good luck 🙂


Post # 6
131 posts
Blushing bee

Maybe they had other reasons for choosing that particular date other then being competitave? 

As for you paying for your own wedding, I guess you have talked to your mother about this? If she had already promised you that she would pay part of the wedding she would still do so. 

Post # 7
1361 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@totheislnds:  Agreed.  Take the high road.  Talk to your mother.  I’m sure she will do what she can for both of your weddings and just because one is “first” doesn’t mean the other will get no money.

Post # 8
131 posts
Blushing bee

Also, if hers is first you can always learn from her mistakes Wink

Post # 9
3303 posts
Sugar bee

Wait, her boyfriend said he didn’t know they were even planning a wedding? Your sister sounds jealous. Continue on with your planning and talk to your mother about the situation. Let her make the call on what to do.

Post # 11
4429 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@HisLittleRed:  mabey hell get scared and dump her ass wont that be a kick from KARMA

its not nice and i would be livid with her. you have every right to be mad shes the pettie one

Post # 12
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Sounds like your sis has been hoping her Boyfriend or Best Friend would propose by a certain time and hoping she could have a specific wedding date.  Maybe they have even been talking marriage and planning a proposal.  However, unless she is actually engaged, it seems wrong for her to be trying to make these moves.  Especially if her Boyfriend or Best Friend is unaware of what’s going on.  Honestly, this indirect pressure from her might make him want to delay the proposal. 

Post # 13
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

She’s planning her wedding ON FACEBOOK.  That her boyfriend apparently doesn’t know about, or is willing to tell people he doesn’t know about.

Seems like a play for attention to me.  Has she always been the type to want the spotlight?

I wouldn’t worry too much about it. Talk to your mom, but I’d couch it more as a “have you seen the way Susie’s been acting lately? I wonder what’s going on with her…” and then lead into budget talk.  If it happens, it happens- be happy for your sister that she’s getting married, regardless of the date. If it doesn’t happen- which I think is the likelier outcome- you stressed for nothing, so don’t stress.

Post # 14
2281 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Take the high road and be the better sister.

Take lots of deep breaths, and ignore her antics. Behave as though she is truly engaged and planning a wedding, and act happy for her, even if you’re not. Then charge ahead and focus on working with your mother to plan your wedding (your poor mother must be even more stressed out than you are about this), and let your sister’s drama unravel on its own. 

Post # 15
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

@HisNightOwl2014:  LOL I said this, too. I’d punch her in the face, personally, since WHO THE FUCK ACTS LIKE THAT?! I mean, I think it’s hilarious when FI’s younger siblings try to call one another out in front of their parents, but this is a whole ‘nother level entirely. 

But I guess you should probably just roll your eyes and ignore her. Talk to your mom about it.

Post # 16
2855 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@HisLittleRed:  I really doubt your mother is going to put all her available resources into only one wedding. I bet your sister’s wedding doesn’t happen on that date anyway.

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