(Closed) Advice for a friend – should she step away

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
454 posts
Helper bee

I don’t think I would step away, because I don’t like enabling people (the girlfriend) who are acting irrational. This is for the guy to deal with. It’s his relationship to manage, to deem what is more important and valuable to him, and in a way this is an important thing to let them deal with themselves, in terms of their own relationship dynamic. But I value friendship differently than some people might, and I definitely understand why she’d want to get away from the drama.

Post # 3
Member
2108 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

I understand her temptation to walk away, it seems like a really simple solution to the problem. However, I think it doesn’t address the underlying issue – the insecurity of the gf for whatever reason. If your friend walks away there’s no saying if the gf will just transfer her insecurity to another woman. It also isn’t your friend’s place to decide how his relationship should be managed. It’s up to the guy, he needs to work out what is best for him.

I think it’s an honourable suggestion from your friend. Losing a friend, even if you instigate it, is hard and shouldn’t be taken lightly. Especially when in the long term I don’t think there will be much benefit being achieved.

Post # 4
Member
3529 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

I wouldn’t step away from the friendship.  It’s not up to your friend to decide the boundaries and rules of his relationship. If he wants to end the friendship, he will. Ending the friendship for him doesn’t mean she would save their relationship either, as she doesn’t know what other issues they might have. Let him decide how to navigate the relationship.

Post # 5
Member
2156 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

 I wouldn’t step away. I think it’s up to the guy to manage his friendships.

Post # 7
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee

Twizbe :  

I wouldn’t step away because that would hurt her friend. However, I can sort of see why the Girlfriend is concerned to an extent.

You’re friend is married and pregnant, I don’t see why she’d be so adament on cutting ties with the relationship. The only thing I can think of is that she’s seen something that makes her uncomfortable.

It’s a sticky situation; I would tell you’re friend to talk to him and see what he wants to do.

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