(Closed) advice for right after you get engaged

posted 6 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
1040 posts
Bumble bee

Well I guess that depends on how soon you are looking to get married, the type of wedding you both envision, the size.  If you have a dream venue id contact them fot availability. Some places book up. Other then what you are stated I’m a huge advocate for not planning and enjoying the moment of being engaged for a little while with no planning. Why jump right into the stress of wedding planning?

Post # 3
784 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016 - Simsbury 1820 House

Enjoy the moment! Don’t worry about ANY planning until after vacation. It may be exciting to begin talking right away but take some time for both of you and let the engagement set in.

Post # 4
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

My biggest advice is let the engagement sink in for a week or two. Also if I’d done it again i wouldnt have put it on social media the same day. He asked around mid afternoon and i rang my parents and my besty and he rang his parents and everyone wanted it on fb so we put it up. We were lucky that we had plans that night and turned our phones off. Once we were back in our hotel and turned phones on there was a barrage of congratulations. It was lovely but i think id prefer to leave it a day or two and just soak it in. 

I left it two weeks before i even started talking about planning and it was the best. I was refreshed and not over excited and we were able to talk about all the ideas we had for our big day. 

Also as far as the actual wedding planning goes budget is the first priority. Nothing else can come before that or you will fall in love with some location or idea and it will break the bank. 

Post # 5
522 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
alohakay:  ohh I worry about this too, more specifically that I will react badly! 

We have a holiday in just over a weeks time  and I can’t help but worry about it

Post # 6
104 posts
Blushing bee

First, enjoy the moment! Spend time just the two of you as a newly engaged couple. Call close family and friends, share the news! 

Id wait at least a month or two then start Seriously planning. Get inspired, Pinterest!


Insure your new ring.

Most important, set a budget. Next venue. Decide when you and your fiancé want to get married.

Then how. Will it be church and reception? Will it be all in one (married and reception at venue? Town hall and reception?

Contact your church if you are planning a church wedding. The date they have available will be the factor in choosing a date for the venue.

Research all the venues you are interested in. Ask as many questions as possible. Most important – does the venue provide catering? How much per person? How much for ghost prices (ie 125$ per plate for a minimum of 100 people but you only have 80 people attending- what do you pay for the no-shows?) What’s the minimum guest count? Do you get a tasting of food before or after you book? whst does the venue provide? What does it not provide? Is there a wedding coordinator on site?

If the venue doesn’t have catering or does not provide specific things, start researching caterers, DJs, rental tables and linens etc.

My advice is to go with a caterer that supplies linens, dishes, etc. 

Also make sure the venue supplies the tables and chairs. If not look at recommended rental companies in the area of the venue.

Pick a theme. Pick colors. Pick bridal party.

DJ. Florist. Hotels for out of towners. Invitations. Favors. Dresses. Groomsmen. Shoes. Accessories. Hair/makeup. Photographer (engagement pics?) Registry. etc.

Very important – make an excel spreadsheet to keep track of guests names, addresses. Make a page for budget. Make up a folder or accordion folder to keep all paperwork in. Also create a wedding email address. Once you sign up for things, you get junk mail as well as serious email. ie [email protected]

Make lists and do everything in stages and a little at a time.

Good luck!! 

Post # 7
7887 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Right after you get engaged, just enjoy it. That is all. 

Post # 8
587 posts
Busy bee

Just enjoy being engaged for a little while first! We told or immediate family an hour or so by a quick phone call after we got engaged. We were in a different country at the time. We put in on facebook a few days later. If your on holiday, it will be nice just enjoying being together and looking at your ring constantly! Lol. You’ll probably get sick of having to message everyone back if you tell them all right away!

Post # 9
1839 posts
Buzzing bee

Enjoy the moment. 

Then enjoy the rest of your vacation.

Somewhere in there you can call your close friends and family (or decide to wait and tell them in person). If you don’t want them putting anything on social media right away tell them so.


All the wedding planning will come after.


Fingers crossed for you!

Post # 10
5362 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

Enjoy the moment! I second a pp who said to wait a couple of weeks/months before doing anything serious. 

We were also on vacation in Hawaii so we texted (a no no to some people but ours were cool with it) those closest to us. Then we had engagement pics done that night and headed home the next day. I didnt put it on Instagram until we were in the airport.  While we were flying home my grandfather passed away so I came home and planned a funeral (I was waiting to tell him in person). We got engaged last August and I’ve just now started seriously planning. It all depends on how fast yall plan on getting married. 

Just breath and soak it all in. I know it might be hard to believe right now, but you will miss the “waiting” anticipation and feelings! 

Post # 11
9838 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

Call whomever you want to call right after, and then enjoy being engaged and the rest of the vacation! Then when you get home you can worry about things like timeframe, booking venues, etc.

Post # 12
17 posts
  • Wedding: October 2017

Just wanted to say thanks for posting this! I’m hopeful for a proposal too very soon and have been doing some research on the imediates after getting engaged. Thanks to all the bees for their advice! Very helpful! 

PS also on vacation- Hawaii, such a dream! 🙂

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 7 months ago by  MrsFairToBe.
Post # 13
17 posts
  • Wedding: October 2017

Sorry repeat post

Post # 14
553 posts
Busy bee

Probably good not to announce it right away, except maybe to parents. Enjoy the moments first, it is NOT about showing off to the world it is about celebrating your love. Also, once you announce it then everyone will inevitably ask if you have set a date. I always found this strange but then again people are just trying to be nice and ask what they think they are supposed to.

Post # 15
29 posts
  • Wedding: October 2015

I got engaged last year whilst on a short break in Paris. It was mid-morning and after the proposal in the park we went to the Louvre. He had already told his parents and asked my Mum and brother for permission, so they all knew it was going to happen just not when, but I really wanted to make sure that we had a few hours of only us knowing that it had actually happened which was really nice. I rang home later that evening, but it was lovely just to be in our own bubble for a little while. Whilst we were there we briefly discussed a few things we might like and a rough idea of date, but I agree with the PP, just make sure that you take time just for yourselves.

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