Post # 1
I love my Fiance but I cant stand sleeping next to him. He snores insanely loud! his mom has sleep apnea and i think he has it too but he refuses to get tested just because he’s extremely stubborn and he also is diabetic and doesnt want to get diagnosed with something else. and even if he would have it, he refuses to ever wear a c-pap machine for breathing. it didnt bother me as bad at first, but i think he’s gotten worse cause he’s much louder now. if i ever try to sleep next to him i dont ever fall asleep, even with ear plugs! i usually have to go sleep in a seperate bed which sucks cause we like to cuddle. ovibously when were married im going to have to sleep next to him. i cant force him to get tested, even tho i really think he should for his own safety alone. anyone have some advice how to deal with a snorer?
Post # 2
Combine ear plugs with a sound machine or a loud fan. My husband snores and I’m a super light sleeper. I was dreading sharing a bed with him but I can tell you that after almost 6 months I’m slowly getting used to it. But I would combine ear plugs with something that make a loud noose to help drown the sound. Hope this helps!
Post # 3
jss77: There is a podcast called “Sleep with me”. I turn it up SUPER LOUD and drown my Fiance out. The guy on the podcast talks in this insanely boring voice until he literally bores you to sleep. It’s the only way that I can fall asleep when my Fiance, who I also suspect has sleep apnea, is snoring down the walls.
Post # 4
Fiance and I knew we were meant to be together because I am literally the only person who can deal with his snoring. It is like freight trains battling in a pit of cymbals, to most people, and me like 8 days a year. That being said, we survive even better with the following:
-he sleeps on his side. FI has sleep apnea, won’t c-pap, and this works well for us. He breathes much better on his side, still snores, but it is much quieter.
-a fan going. i’ve always slept with one on, and it helps with noise cover as well
-sound machine. this thing is magic-town. we lived together for 3 years before we got one, and it changed my life. i could sleep through his snoring most nights without it, but those bad nights where every noise seems like an attack on my slumber, the sound machine levels it out. we keep it on “rolling thunder”,turned up pretty loud, and i can focus on it when i need to unfocus from the snoring.
Fiance and i have been together almost 9 years, and the snoring has become just a part of life. in fact, when i travel without him, i can’t sleep..it’s too quiet.
Post # 5
jss77: You don’t need advice how to deal with snoring, you need advice on how to get your Fiance to take care of himself. This is the issue. If he does have sleep apnea, wich it appears he does, it will have very negative impact on his quality of life.
Post # 6
Please do some research on sleep apnea and strongly encourage him to get tested. The sleep study is ONE NIGHT and it could save his life. People don’t realize that sleep apnea is a lot more dangerous than just annoyingly loud snoring. It is often associated with heart and liver problems, for example. Not to mention that it can lead to both of you being tired during the day, which can be risky in and of itself.
There are so many types of masks available for CPAP machines. They have some that just cover the nose, for example, and a lot of people find them more comfortable and less cumbersome than normal masks. I tend to be a mouth-breather, especially when sleeping, so I need a full-face mask. It took me a couple tries to find a mask that was comfortable, (they have you try them on in the store if you go to a medical supply place, but something that it comfortable for two minutes of wear in the store may not be comfortable after sleeping all night). But there are SOOO many types of masks now that there is something for everyone.
This really isn’t something you should “just deal with” or try to cover up with fans and noise machines.
Post # 7
Miss Apricot: i completely agree. and i dont see how sound machines would do anything or a fan. if anything that will just be super loud and keep me awake too. i really wish he would go get tested. like i said his mom has it bad and has the machine. i dont want to wake up next to him one day dead cause he stopped breathing in his sleep just because he was too stubborn to get checked out. if i fall asleep before him that im actually out before he sleeps, then im fine and dont hear it. but that like never happens cause he can fall asleep almost instantly which is really strange to me.
Post # 8
Aside from the health risks associated with uncontrolled sleep apnea like stroke, heart attack, worsening diabetes or falling asleep while driving .., he should know that there are alternatives to CPAP. There are dental devices and surgeries. None are as successful as CPAP but meh. It’s an option.
Post # 9
We had the same poblem. It got so bad we decided, for the sake of our relationship, to just do separate bedrooms. I wat getting VERY resentful and sleep deprived and knew if we didn’t do something we would be facing big problems.
One year later everything is fine. Our sex life is fine. We cuddle before we go to sleep and then he goes to his room and falls asleep. No big deal.
Post # 10
jss77: Your Fiance really needs to speak to his endo about the snoring and family history of sleep apnea. Sleep apnea can have a serious effect on blood sugar levels and OSA can lead to insulin resistenance. Not to mention that untreated sleep apnea can have an effect on the cardiovascular system and that coupled with diabetes can lead to serious complications like diabetic retinopathy (which can lead to blindness), stroke and neuropathy which can lead to amputation.
Post # 11
Miss Apricot: agree. My father had sleep apnea his entire life, horribly loud snorer, had surgery but refused or couldn’t wear the mask…for some reason, they never fit him correctly, even when he was in the hospital. Sleep apnea does damage the heart and this is what ultimately caused his death at 63. He had other problems so it was a combo of this and other breathing/heart related issues.
My hubs does snore but he does not have sleep apnea. I snore as well And I always want my hubs to video me so I can hear what I sound like – I’m paranoid i am as loud as my father was!! You could hear him in the street if the windows were open.
Post # 12
I had the EXACT same problem. Boyfriend snores. He’s overweight and has diabetes. Im sure its all related to sleep apnea. He refuses to get checked out also…
I recently moved in a few months ago though and I have to say.. I actually am used to it! Before I would always just go sleep on the couch, but now that we live together, I don’t hear it as much. If he’s facing me, I still have to wear ear plugs sometimes. And no, that doesn’t drown it out. But with those and I usually put a blanket over my head, I go to sleep just fine. It’s even better if he’s facing the other way.
I know it’s not that simple for everyone though. I hope we both can get our guys to go to the doctor one of these days. Until then, there’s nothing wrong with sleeping seperately if you’re still making the time together beforehand. Good luck!
Post # 13
I read this title as “advice for stoners” and thought, “Yaaaas, this is gonna be a fun Friday!!!”
Post # 14
Record your Fiance snoring for about 20-30 minutes. Then when you are next going to bed together play it back to him at full volume. Don’t let him switch the recording off.
After 20-30 minutes have your discussion with him. Tell him that he has to do something about the problem.
It may be that he hasn’t realised just how bad the snoring has become.
Post # 15
The number of people who have SOs who snore so loudly they are forced to wear ear plugs or worse, sleep seperately, but still won’t have a sleep study done is alarming. I’m reminded of children with the idea “if I can’t see you, you can’t see me.” It’s like they assume “if I don’t have a sleep study done and I’m not diagnosed, I don’t have sleep apnea.” Get your head out of your….er….the sand….and GET. TESTED. Sleep apnea can be DANGEROUS if it’s left untreated.
I agree with Supersleuth’s suggestion of recording the snoring. Then INSIST they make an appointment for a sleep study. I’ll admit, I was nervous to have it done, but my husband had started sleeping in the guest bedroom because of my snoring, and that was not okay with me. It wasn’t until after my sleep study that I realized that sleep apnea is even more serious than I realized (I knew about the obvious sleepiness, etc., but didn’t realize it could lead to other health problems). Now I am a huge advocate for getting tested and TREATED.