Post # 46
One last update for anyone who has been curious: it’s been rough, y’all. We came back into contact after the one month, and she immediately started attacking my character, imputing motives, and had clearly framed herself as a victim of my actions during the absence. She condescended to me and scolded me like a chil–saying that my email was ‘an inappropriate form of conflict resolution’ and that she would not allow such behavior in the future. She told me her desires were fair and minor, and that my reaction to them was manipulative and that I was projecting. She also called me and my words cruel and misguided. My email, and all of my correspondence, has been full of ‘I feel,’ ‘I think,’ and ‘It seems,’ statements, which to me communicate that I understand that I am operating in a subjective narrative which is informed by my imperfect perspective. I never called her anything–although she says I called her pathetic and obsessed–or even implied her to be anything. It was always about how i felt, not how or what she was. But her communication has been extremely attack oriented, and she keeps bringing up resolved issues to attack me with. She is also holding me responsible for the fact that despite the fact that i asked her if she was okay with taking time apart and if the timeline worked for her and she agreed, she apparently didn’t want to take that much time apart. She didn’t tell me, and she is trying to use the fact that she made a choice to not tell me it’s my fault and I behaved inappropriately. I sent her a series of text explaining my positions, telling her exactly how I felt, and ending the friendship this morning. I am shaking–I am overwhelmed and exhausted and anxious, and she’s replied and I can’t bring myself to read it because I’m tired of hearing what she thinks of me. But I feel os much relief that I don’t have to be bound to what she thinks of me or what she wants from me anymore. Thanks, Bees. <3
Post # 47
Good for you OP. Stay strong, if she tries to contact you again, completely ignore it. She sounds like an absolute psycho. You’re well rid of her.
Post # 48
Block her now and forever. Close the book. Cut the ties. Don’t weaken and read her response. Let this morning be the end. Be kind to yourself today and do something fun and life affirming.
Don’t contact her in the future no matter how much time passes. Let’s hope she realises sooner rather than later that she needs to get on with hers, without you in it. Best of luck Bee.
Post # 49
I understand how frustrating that must feel to have operated from a logical place and to get a response from her that was so illogical. Frustrating because you can’t possibly resolve much less get your point across to someone who can’t understand simple concepts.
I hope your email to her ending the friendship made it clear that it wasn’t a negotiation and that you would be blocking her and cutting all ties permanently. If you said that to her than there is no reason you need to even read her response. Delete without reading and move on. If you didn’t make it that clear, again don’t read her response just reply with a notification that you didn’t read her response but you wanted to make it clear that you are blocking her and cutting all ties and that this is permanent. Then block and move on.
Good for you for removing yourself from this situation. I hate to think how horribly she could have escalated in future if you carried on with this and she really snapped.
Post # 50
Just cut the cord already. Like a pp said, she sounds psycho.
Post # 51
I honestly can’t imagine entertaining this kind of psycho relationship. So glad you cut her loose…I hope you stick with it!
Post # 52
What in the actual fuck.
This girl sounds 100 shades of crazy…and crazy is not a word I throw around a lot! It sounds like she has an obsession with you that is bordering on dangerous. You need to end this friendship and cut off communication.
I knew a girl who exhibited similar behavior as this, and her actions were at best impulsive, at worst dangerous and I had to almost go to legal lengths to keep her away from me. While I suspect there are some mental issues here with your friend that need to be addressed, that is unfortunate but it isn’t your burden to carry.