(Closed) Advice for those waiting…from a waiting girl

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
493 posts
Helper bee

Thanks for that! I needed to hear that. I feel the same way. My SO and I have been together for 4 years. And I KNOW he has the ring because I went with him to get it 10 WEEK AGO!!!!  It’s been so hard for me since he’s had the ring because I feel like he hasn’t been planning to propose. I could just tell. Sometimes I would think it was coming then…NOTHING. So low and behold I was right. This past weekend he admitted to not knowing “how” to propose because he felt like I expected something extravagant and I don’t. He could do it at home for all I can. So without telling him how to propose I told him stop stressing and overthinking the proposal because it isn’t about that and just do it…however he wants to. Hopefully I won’t be waiting past the end of this month. **fingers crossed** Good luck to you~!

Post # 4
684 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I know exactly how you feel… I often find myself defending my boyfriend.  “It’s coming, I know it’ll happen soon.”  When do we REALLY know?

I got a tip from a mutual friend that it’ll happen sometime around April for me.  But it’s so frustrating to wait and waiting almost sucks all the excitement out of it.  I hope I won’t miss this anxious feeling at ALL.  😛

Post # 5
32 posts

Ladies, I was in a similar boat when I was younger.  I ended up marrying the wrong man.  Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying any of this will happen to you; I just would get so emotional though and in the end I felt like I pressured him to marry me.  The truth was that he was unconsciously stringing me along because I was available and so in love with him but he didn’t really love me, I was just convenient.  Today I have a wonderful man who loves me more than I could ever hope for and though I found myself after 15 months starting to get the “will he?” bug, I just focused on all the things that were good about the relationship and not the things that I didn’t yet have (ring, new house, wedding, etc.).  I wish you all the best and congrats on being om great relationships. 

Post # 6
390 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

My SO and I have been togeth 5 1/2 years and im waiting( not so patiently). We were only 15 when we started dating and now were 21 and graduating college next year I feel like were ready. He actually told me that we will be engaged in 1-3 months haha.

Post # 7
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Do you bees ever have to defend yourselves?  When I’m at family get togethers, SO isn’t the only target.  I’m told to “behave myself” and I think it runs along the lines of you’re-giving-the-milk-for-free-so-you-are-going-to-be-unmarried-forever.  Ugh.

Post # 8
1735 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Starshollow: Gosh, my mother does this. She’s like, “Well you’re already living together and sleeping together, why would he need to propose when he’s already getting everything he wants?” It just makes me feel… crappy. She only does it when I’m talking about wedding stuff, because she gets annoyed that I’m talking about it when I’m not even engaged yet. Still, it’s a hurtful thing to say. I mean, what do they think, that our SO’s are just using us for their own needs? Seriously, it gets so irritating.

Post # 9
128 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Starshollow: i guess, “my baby factory will shut down soon, i’m not getting any younger, because I want to spend the rest of my life with him”, or any other excuse a person in waiting has is reasonable…. it all comes down to the guy and their ability to provide and be financially prepared…. all a girl can do is wait! No excuse or reason is good enough!

Post # 10
488 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012





My family won’t even tell people we aren’t living together.  In fact, my own SISTER doesn’t even know we live together. I swear, when I told my father his eyes rolled into the back of his head.  But, it’s fine, we aren’t one of those familes that discusses everything, but my mother has told me numerous times that he isn’t going to marry me now!  It gets really frusterating.  However, as per my previous developments that isn’t true at all… It totally does depend on the guy.  

It’s good to know that my parents aren’t the only ones who are “old school” Undecided

Post # 11
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

It’s easy to forget that our partners have to save up hard, pick a ring then actually have the balls to ask our families, then make the proposal special.

You can’t expect a good party to happen overnight without planning I guess, why should this be any different? I bet my SO is swamped with information and expectations right now..

Thanks for this, you’ve definately made me step back and think that we should both want this engagement, it will come in time.

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