(Closed) Advice for wording of save the date insert for a Friday wedding.

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
47254 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

kcrose:  We have to be careful not to treat our prospective guests like they are stupid. If I received your STD and wanted to attend your wedding, I would immediately go to my calendar,mark the date , and  likely say to my Darling Husband “kcRose is getting married on a Friday. Let’s make sure to book time off and make our hotel reservation now.”

Post # 3
Member
1754 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

kcrose:  “We wanted to be sure to point out that our wedding is on a Friday so that you may plan accordingly.”

This one sounds most appropriate to me and doesn’t seem to make any demands or pry into people’s work lives like some of the other examples. They don’t need to be told to take off work – they’ll know if you tell them it’s a Friday wedding. So I like this one!

Post # 4
Member
586 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

kcrose:  I agree with julies1949:, we had friends get married on a Sunday in September who sent out invites only (no save the dates) with only the date and not the day of the week. I went to the calendar to put it in and noted it was a Sunday, no big deal.

I think it’s hard to do this type of thing without coming off as condescending or presumptious (I know this is not your intention) – I find both the phrase “please keep in mind” and “plan accordingly” very off-putting, and I think telling people to make sure they take off work is a little presumptious (again, I know this is not your intention). If you’re going to do something like this, I would vote for something very light like “We look forward to seeing you on Friday, July 29th!” or “We hope to celebrate with you on Friday, July 29th!” – or some other variation that just slips the day of the week into a light hearted greeting rather than something that points it out to people in a way that could come of harsh regardless of intention.

Just as an aside: are the back of your save the dates blank by chance? My fiance and I decided to do our Save the Dates as a postcard so we ordered the save the dates with a blank back and then bought a rubber stamp on Etsy with our names, date, and a design on it to fill space. I know you’ve already printed them, but if the back happens to be blank you could consider a rubber stamp to add something that includes the day of the week. 

Post # 5
Member
47254 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

penguinwapi:  

We hope to celebrate with you on Friday, July 29th!”

That’s perfect.

Post # 6
Member
1604 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I dont think the date is enough, sorry.  The time and location are important too.  Some people who work in offices get off early on Fridays, they may not want — or be able to — take off early.  Maybe reference a website with details.   

Post # 7
Member
13785 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think you just need to say “Friday, Month Day” and the location.  They’ll either know, or know to look up where it is to see how far it is.  They’ll figure it out!

Post # 8
Member
687 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I like the idea of making a wedding website and giving the address in the insert. For this particular wedding, I think the location and time are also important. If I got a STD with the date and saw it was a Friday wedding, it wouldn’t occur to me that the wedding would be scheduled in a way such that it would require even local guests (or guests who live locally to the venue, for that matter) to take at minimum a half day off work.

Also, I’d avoid wording that presumes people will indeed take the day off work to come to your wedding. An invitation isn’t a summons — you’re letting them know about the wedding, but they haven’t committed to coming, so telling them, for example, “Be sure to request Friday July 29th off as soon as possible.” sounds presumptuous.

Post # 9
Member
1297 posts
Bumble bee

So you made your Save-The-Date Cards with only a date?  Your guests do not know that it will be an at least 1.5 hour drive one way?  I’d personally be more annoyed with not knowing that I would have to drive so far away without warning.  And if your ceremony is at 3:45, people are most likely going to have to take the entire day off unless they leave directly from work, don’t stop to eat, and are already wearing to work what they would be wearing to your wedding.  As an example, I have to wear scrubs to work so there is no way I could get away with not stopping to change, plus, my hospital does not really allow us to take half days so I would have to take the full day off.  Not that you asked any of this, put I’m putting it out there since you mentioned the date.

I would have a wedding website with the venue info but I don’t think you need to mention it’s on a Friday unless it’s something like “we look forward to celebrating with you on Friday, xxxx xxxx” like another Bee said.

Edit – I would probably lose a separate insert if you put it in with the STD.

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 11 months ago by  redmango.
Post # 10
Member
8963 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

kcrose:  Is there any way you could re-do the STDs? I always say don’t sweat the small stuff, especially when it’d going to cost more money and not serve any real purpose. But in this case, it’s pretty important. You’re having a hard time thinking of good wording because there isn’t any good wording. The way to address it is to just include the day with the date, time, and location. That gives everyone exactly what they need, without sounding condescending, presumptuous, or demanding. If you could possibly swing fixing it and re-printing, that’s what I recommend. Otherwise, “Hope to see you Friday July 29!” sounds best to me for an insert/sticker/stamp, whatever.

Post # 11
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

kcrose:  all of your options sound condescending to me. Leave it be, or order new save the dates. As someone who got married on NYE, I feel your pain, but you also have to consider that some ppl may join you for the reception, but not the ceremony, as some guests won’t be able to take off work. 

Post # 12
Member
6864 posts
Busy Beekeeper

julies1949:  this, or even Friday afternoon, July 29th…I would personally assume a Friday wedding would be an evening event.

 

Post # 14
Member
399 posts
Helper bee

Include the word Friday on the Save the date before the date (Friday February 5th).  It wont call out attention or people look dumb.  They just wont think you made a typo 🙂

Post # 15
Member
848 posts
Busy bee

Mine is Friday July 29th too! And for the same reason. Saturdays are expensive! I didn’t point it out. It is also 1.5 hours from where everyone lives. lol! How weird. But I just put the date and City/State on the STD.  I’d think everyone would check the date when they got it.  Our invites are also going out 3 months before so it should be plenty of time.  I believe it’s worded as Friday, July 29th on our invite. 

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