(Closed) Advice-Husband talking to a girl behind my back that he slept with before me

posted 10 years ago in Married Life
Post # 47
Member
583 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Ugh, I hate to say this but I kinda second USAandKSA‘s question. If he works 24 hour shifts (so I’m guessing like 24 hrs on/24 hrs off or something like that) That would mean there are a lot of days that he’s at home while you’re at work? Do you know how he spends his time while you’re at work? Are there long periods of time where he just “hangs out?” Normally, I wouldn’t accuse a guy of anything just because he has the *opportunity* to cheat, but this sounds like more to me than even just flirting or ego stroking. I’ve had a colorful past with men, I’ll admit. And I’ve had my share of sex buddies. And inevitably every now and then one of them will contact me (I don’t hide it from my husband) and we’ll chat friendly for a few days. It always (every. single time.) comes to a “we should meet up” conversation. Which is where I say “sorry, I’m off the market.” I agree with PP who ask the question “if it was just sex before, why would it be a friendship now?” relationships based on sex only rarely turn into completely platonic friendships. 

If it were me, I’d probably try to get in touch with the girl and see what info you can get from her. Haha, but that’s me. Not saying it’s a good idea necessarily 😛 If nothing else, you need to watch this like a hawk. Start asking questions. You don’t have to grill him, but a little “so what did you do today honey?” Keep your eyes open. 

Post # 48
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

My advice is to confront the issue head on. Don’t wait 25 years like my mother did. My father ended up having over 10 affairs with “just friends” Save yourself the lawyers fees and find out what is really going on. Its you or her. He can’t have both as hard as he is trying. I am prob bias since I have had cheating issues with every man I have been with-but you deserve the best in life. Don’t settle for someone who still wants to be a boy.

Post # 49
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@SkiBunny: After going to counseling with was the issue?  What was the route of the issue of why he did this?

The topic ‘Advice-Husband talking to a girl behind my back that he slept with before me’ is closed to new replies.

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