(Closed) Advice: Make FSILs Bridesmaids or go with my gut? (long)

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Should I make my FSILs Bridesmaids?
    Yes, but don't include others I'm closer to. : (0 votes)
    Yes, just enlarge the bridal party to be inclusive of everyone. : (1 votes)
    4 %
    No, go with FI and my feeling not to involve them. : (14 votes)
    50 %
    No, just give them another title/job. : (13 votes)
    46 %
    Try something else! (explain please) : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    116 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Don’t do it!! The arguments will just escalate and they will both just add more stress to your wedding planning. If you Fiance supports you on this, I would listen to him. And I definitely don’t think either of you are being reasonable. It’s your wedding and you both should decide how to plan it!

    Post # 4
    Member
    5786 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2011

    Go with your gut, her behavior is only going to get worse.

    Post # 5
    Member
    1276 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    Go with your gut and keep her out of the bridal party. I am definitely a fan of only having one attendant, keeps the drama out. You don’t want to be stressed out on your day and it seems like she might bring in drama. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    6825 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    There is no need to include his sisters in your wedding as BM’s, go with your gut

    Post # 7
    Member
    96 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I might be making my Future Sister-In-Law my bridesmaid, but we’ve hung out several times and she’s super chill. If you’re not very close with your BMs then your wedding day wont’ be as fun, not to mention your close friends might feel betrwyed if they aren’t the BMs. And too large a wedding party would get out of hand.

    Post # 8
    Member
    7405 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    Your not close with them, your FH is already saying not to, and they are already proving themselves overbearing. So why would invite this drama into your bridal party?

    Post # 9
    Hostess
    1427 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Go with your gut!!! Avoid the drama and potential chaos…. Stick with your original plan; besides your Fiance supports the idea of not including his sisters!

    Post # 10
    Member
    573 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Go with your gut (and your FI) on this one! If you guys think it would just get worse, then don’t! 

    Post # 12
    Member
    1638 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @MrsMagnus: Just say you and Fiance wanted a small bridal party and your decision is final. You do not owe anyone an explanation.

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    4046 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Both my brothers are engaged/married and I was not a Bridesmaid or Best Man in either of their weddings. I kind of wish I had been invited to the bridal showers, but other than that, no hard feelings! Go with your gut.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1629 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    @MrsMagnus: Just say that you and Fiance really don’t dig the idea of a bridal party, think it is not your style, and you don’t want it.  If you feel like you want to include them in some other capacity (like a reading or a toast), just cut them off at the pass and say “oh hey, we’re so happy–we’d like you to do X and Y so that you’re a part of OUR day!”…that way their role is defined and they recognize it is not in the Bridal Party

    Post # 16
    Member
    378 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @bklynbridetobe: 100% agree! It seems like a no-brainer to me too…but if you think involving her in some way will lead to less crap for you in the future, involve her in some way (do a reading, set up the unity candle/sand ceremony etc.)….going through the same thing with my Future Sister-In-Law. My FH wouldn’t want her in the wedding even if I begged him! But I don’t want her to be excluded since she is family so she’s doing some of the bridesmaids’ hair (she’s a hairdresser)

    The topic ‘Advice: Make FSILs Bridesmaids or go with my gut? (long)’ is closed to new replies.

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