(Closed) Advice needed and greatly appreciated!

posted 7 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
Member
3374 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think you need to get engaged to see if your parents/his parents will help out or not.

I know you don’t want to wait, but if you’re broke and your parents won’t help, I’m not sure what alternatives there are? We waited until we could finance our own wedding and it was a couple of years after we graduated until we got engaged.

Post # 4
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Sometimes you just have to live within your means. I took on 2 jobs. I work full time, attend school in the evenings and work my second job on the weekends. That’s how I’m saving.

You may just have to have a small or tight budget wedding. Or you might have to hold off on purchasing a home together. Sometimes having it all isn’t an option. If “THE” wedding is important to you… you might ahve to wait 4+ years for it.

Post # 6
Member
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I was ready to be married 6 years ago, but we couldn’t afford it until now.  We lived together for 5 years and finally tied the knot last month.  There’s nothing wrong with waiting awhile to get married, especially if this is your first boyfriend.

Post # 7
Member
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

If I were you, I would just have the coversation with my parents. I too am a young bride, still in college (graduate in December! WOOHOO!) and I am lucky enough for my parents to be paying for my full wedding. My fiance is two years older than me and has a good paying full time job, so he already has a house, and he paid for my engagement ring. His parents gave us money towards our honeymoon (almost enough to cover the entire trip) and my fiance is paying for the remainder of the honeymoon. I am an only child, so this does have something to do with why my parents were so willing to pay. I am not having an extravegant wedding ($12,000 budget) but this is more than enough for a beautiful wedding in Alabama. I would encourage you to just ask your parents what they would be willing to contribute, that way you won’t have to do any guessing! Since you and your SO have been together for a while, they probably think it is coming soon, anyway! Good luck!

Post # 9
Member
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

We’re literally going month by month with what we can afford to handle on his monthly salary, neither of us have savings. The Future In-Laws have been amazing, and without their help we’d either be living off scraps or not having a reception! But, we didn’t ask, they offered.

Post # 10
Member
590 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012 - St. Philip Catholic Church/Arcadia Brewing Co.

My Fiance and I had planned on paying for our own wedding and as such it was going to be quite small. One way I saved a TON of money in School was to not drink fancy coffee drinks (I don’t know if you do but HOLY COW THOS COST A TON) and try not to go out to eat. You would be amazed at how quickly little things turn into big clumps of money! I always found it easier to not buy something when I knew there was a great trip (or wedding) I was saving for.

Also it wouldn’t hurt to talk to your parents and find out if they plan to contribute at all. It can be pretty awkward but you’ll have to talk about it sooner or later! We had assumed ours would not and then they all (his and mine) very generously offered to help out.

Good luck!

Post # 11
Member
2691 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I’m twenty and in that whole pre-engaged period too. Unfortuanately I am not in school and work full time, but all that money goes to bills so saving for me and my SO right now is really hard.

We are working on nailing down price ranges for different things in our area. We’ve been on venue walkthroughs, and done some online research. Once we get an idea of what we need to save, we’re going to adjust our engagemnt period accordingly. I don’t want to wait to get married either, but the way I look at it, you only get to do this once, and I don’t want anything being sacrificed because I couldn’t pay for it.

I am planning on setting aside ALL of my tax money, and my SO is doing the same, so that will be a couple thousand dollars which will be nice. Beyond that, we are hoping that our family will forgo actual “presents” for holidays and just give us cash or buy certain things for the wedding (10% of the flowers, the shoes, ect).

We are also having a sit down with my Dad and stepmom next week. My Mom has already said she is going to help as much as possible, but I have yet to get anything from my Dad (he’s not as “in the loop” as my Mom) so we are going to see if he will be contributing.

My best advice would be, keep guest count to a bare minimum and put yourself on the strictest budget you can manage. We found out that if we don’t go out to eat and just pay the essentials we can save up to $2500 a month!

Good luck and if you ever wanna talk weddings/waiting/anything PM me!

Post # 13
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

You should discuss with your parents about their financial support first, just in case. Next create a budget and stick with it lol. My fiance and I set up an ING account, that helped alot.

The topic ‘Advice needed and greatly appreciated!’ is closed to new replies.

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