(Closed) Advice needed, deadbeat MOH :(

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

It sucks that she is being so unsupportive, but I don’t think it’s enough to make you feel like an “unloved loser.” You have six other BMs that are ALL flying in to stand by you on your special day! And who cares if you plan your own bachelorette party? You’re the one who knows all your BMs personalities, it’d actually probably work out better for everyone if you planned it.

You said your Maid/Matron of Honor is manic/depressive… I wouldn’t be too hard on her, no matter how disappointed I may be. 

Post # 4
724 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

You have 7 people flying across the country to stand up in your wedding, and countless others attending to witness your union, and you feel like an unloved loser? I think you need some perspective hon. Also why is the wedding date next to your username in the past?

Post # 5
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I think you need to back off from trying to make sure she comes and books her flight. If she comes because you pressured her, would it really hold much value to you? You metnioned you’ve spoken to her, so she knows how you feel. Let her figure her stuff out (or not). You’re a tough cookie– as much as it will be stressful for her to flake, you will handle it and be okay.


In the meantime, you’ve got 6 other friends who are showing you how much they love you. Focus on that and perhaps think of the bachlorette as not only a celebration for your upcoming wedding but also as something nice you can do for your friends!


Post # 6
8422 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

@navyblueandyellow:  I think the most important thing is to make sure she is even coming….I mean your wedding is a month out and she hasn’t even got her ticket yet?


I seriously think that your priorities are a bit off if you are only focusing on your bacheolorette party…..what makes it the duty of a Maid/Matron of Honor to plan it??


I get you are upset if she isn’t supportive and I’d be upset too but as you stated she is across the country from you and prob pretty hard to plan anything not even being near you!


I’d just be happy that she was by my side on that day supporting me and helping me that day…..you also have 6 other girls so try to focus on making the best of it. Seriously who needs a bacheolorette party anyway? That is hardly a priority to worry about  in the grand scheme of things!




Post # 8
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@navyblueandyellow:  I suggest you ask one or more of your other BMs to plan your bachelorette, for the Thursday night. I’m sure, out of the 6, there will be someone who’d be happy to do that for you.

Post # 9
9548 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Let your girls know that they can’t stay with you and will need to provide their own transportation. Not the end of the world if you don’t have a bachelorette. And one of the other girlsmay step up by that time. Don’t stress about it. Have a backup plan in case she flakes and doesn’t make it, but don’t let it stress you out.

Post # 10
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’m planning my own bachelorette. I feel like bms have enough to do.

The topic ‘Advice needed, deadbeat MOH :(’ is closed to new replies.

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