(Closed) Advice Needed! Difficult situation…

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
47457 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
Sarah2015:  Just tell them that your workload prevents you from taking a vacation at that time. Vacations get cancelled all the time.

Post # 3
372 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Oh OP what a crappy situation 🙁  Are you willing to tell any of the party going what the true situation is? Are you friendly perhaps with one of the girls? If you are then at least somebody would be sympathetic to your situation & fight your corner if anyone talked trash about you for dropping out! 

Failing that the only thing you can say is that your mutual workloads have changed so it it’s not possible & offer to pay if any money has already been put up front. 

There is no easy way to do it but actually as long as no-one will lose out financially because of you dropping out I’m sure all they will be is disappointed.

Best of luck with everything 🙂

Post # 4
3241 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

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Sarah2015: Sorry to hear about what you’re going through. Honestly, just tell people that something came up and you’re no longer able to go on the trip. Repeat it as many times as possible. Tell your husband he needs to play defense between his family and you and also repeat, as many times as possible, “Sarah can’t come. She just can’t. Stop asking her.” Just shut it down, no apologies needed.

Post # 5
558 posts
Busy bee

Well, first of all, I’m impressed by your strength and patience in dealing with this. You have a lucky husband and I hope he is grateful. 

Second, I have a large, loud Italian family, and I don’t think just trying to shut it down without explanation is going to go well. If anything, that will make it more “mysterious” and interesting. Fuel for the gossip fire. 

Is he still going? If not, just say that his schedule has changed. If he is going, I would just let him communicate he has left work undone that must be taken care of (house repair, legal, whatever – the more boring and truthful, the better) and you are being generous enough to stay behind and take care of it so he can still enjoy time with his family. Either way, he should be bearing the burden of responsibility for the unfortunate outcome. 

Good luck 🙁

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