(Closed) Advice on a malicious Maid?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
28 posts
  • Wedding: March 2013

I would not give her the option of stepping down…yet. Instead, I would just have a heart to heart talk with her and ask her if all is okay in her life. She’d probably appreciate that act of friendship. I’d also ask whether making a decision without her input was the thing that bothered her, or if something else in the bridesmaid process is making her uncomfortable. Once you have the answers to these questions, I think you’ll have a better idea of whether to provide her with the option to step down. 

I think it’s great that the other BMs want to keep the drama away from you, but with them being tight-lipped, you may not be getting both sides of the story, either. This talk with this one particular Bridesmaid or Best Man won’t take longer than say, a Saturday lunch. You probably dont have time to deal with stuff like this, but I do think if you take out an hour or 2 to figure out what’s going on with her, you will be armed with better info and can make a better decision.

I think if you don’t do your due diligence, even putting the option of stepping down on the table may offend her deeply.

Post # 4
2651 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I think it’s best to give her an out, if she wants it.I would talk to her  about her life,  and when she gives you her spheal,  say ” you have all this going on on top of being a BM? You must be so stressed out!  I totally understand if you want to step down as a bm, if you need to., but I would really love for you to sill attend as a guest !

Post # 5
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i think malicious is a pretty strong word for a person that had a bit of drama with friends and then bitched to you about it – especially as you suspect she has other issues happening in her life but youve not asked her about it

Post # 6
8680 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@eloping:  This exactly!

Plus if I am reading your post right OP, she said she would attend the wedding and just not be included in anything else your other bridesmaids are doing. That sound perfectly acceptable to me. She is keeping away from the other bridesmaids so as to avoid anymore trouble. I think she is being rather gracious since it takes more than one person to tango.

It isn’t written anywhere that I know of that BM’s had to like each other and get along!

The topic ‘Advice on a malicious Maid?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors