Post # 1
I’m considering having a flower girl, and we have several options in our family. The first two would be my step brother’s children, who will be nine and three and a half (almost four) to be a flower girl and ringbearer. However, both of these kids are horribly ill behaved and while I love them both, I’d rather not deal with them in my wedding party, especially since their parents will not make an effort to control their behaviour and it’s usually up to me to handle it. Normally, that’s okay, but not on my wedding day.
My cousin also has a daughter, who will be four. She’s wonderfully well behaved, and my cousin will make an effort to ensure that things go smoothly that day. I don’t see my cousin often, but we are a close famiily.
However, to complicate things, my dad and my stepmom recently took custody of my nephew. I feel like I couldn’t ask my cousin’s daughter without terribly offending my dad.
So, hive – what’s your vote? Which kids do I ask? Or do I just throw in the towel and give up?
Post # 3
I think you should do what you feel right doing and what you want to do.
We were confused as to which chidren to choose as we would be leaving others out. We just decided it wasn’t worth it to us to have some of the kids and parents upset we didn’t pick them…and we didn’t want them all in the wedding. That just worked for us.
You can always run your idea about using your cousin’s daughter by your dad to see what he says??
Post # 4
We skipped child attendants all together, and never regretted it for a minute. They’re cute, but it’s just so much easier.
Post # 5
Definitely don’t include children who are horribly ill-behaved – the last thing you want is a child screaming or behaving in a ridiculous manner at such an important event. I would just ask your cousin’s daughter (4 is a great age for a FG) and if your father says anything, you can either tell him that you only wanted a flower girl and didn’t want your nephew feeling left out if you asked his sister, or you can be completely honest and say that given the behaviour of these two particular children, you did not feel comfortable asking them to be in your wedding as you did not want to have to worry about their behaviour at your wedding. It’s your wedding and if there’s one thing I learned through my 15 months of wedding planning already, it’s that you can’t please everyone so don’t even try! 🙂