- 6 years ago
First of all, I feel kind of dumb even writing about this because I know that it sounds like silly high school drama. But I really would like some advice.
Recently I have reunited (via Facebook) with an old friend of mine, I’ll call him B. B was my very best friend through middle school/high school, then somewhere along the way we had a falling out that resulted in us losing touch. Ten years later I found him on FB and we have both been so happy to be back in touch again. He lives about 2 hours away from me and we discovered that we will both be at a concert in my town a few weeks from now, so we will finally get to talk in person! I’ve been really looking forward to that, and Darling Husband has been looking forward to meeting him too.
After B and I stopped talking in high school, I started dating a boy who I’ll call T. He was my first serious boyfriend, and the only serious one I’ve had other than Darling Husband. We dated for 2 years and then broke up, and I thought I would never recover. I then met Darling Husband and he was amazing and helped me put myself back together again. We weren’t dating exclusively yet and one night I met T one last time and we ended up sleeping together. It was a horrible mistake and Darling Husband was very upset and jealous and angry at T and this pushed us into realizing that we wanted to be in a serious, exclusive relationship. It was the best thing that could have happened for Darling Husband and I but needless to say, Darling Husband was not fond of T.
Years went by and T was never mentioned again. Then, as soon as I got engaged, T came crawling out of the woodwork. He called and texted and begged me to please go see him, that he made a horrible mistake letting me go, that he missed me, etc. This certainly did not make Darling Husband (then FI) like T any better. In fact he was pretty fed up with him. I got married and Darling Husband and I have been very happy, though T has texted me a few times since. It’s not a big problem, but Darling Husband definitely doesn’t like him.
On to my current problem: Recently I have noticed B and T conversing on Facebook. I didn’t realize they even knew each other but it looks as though they became friends after T and I broke up, then they lost touch and have just started talking again. As far as I know, neither of them knows that they both know ME…I don’t know how I would ever come up in a conversation between them so I’m sure they don’t know. But, lo and behold, apparently they both love the band whose show B and I have made plans to meet at, and now it looks like they are planning to go to the concert TOGETHER.
Surely my issue is obvious. I REALLY want to meet and talk to my friend! But I don’t know how on earth to navigate the T situation! B and I don’t really know each other that well yet, so I don’t really want to tell him all the nitty gritty details of my past with T. Now I don’t know if I should tell Darling Husband that T will be there, becasue I don’t want to seem like I’m making it into a big deal. But I don’t want him to be blindsided either…or have a miserable evening because of this. I also don’t want to blow off B because we’ve been planning this for months, though T being there kind of ruins that anyway.
Sigh. Bees, what do I do?