(Closed) Advice on inviting a co-worker

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 4
257 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m in a similar situation! I drew the line at inviting coworkers that I’m actually friends with and will talk to/hang out with outside of the office. But one of my other coworkers made the statement about how she was going to two weddings this summer, and then looked at me and went right?? I froze and didn’t know how to respond! If I invite her, I feel like I need to invite the rest of the office- which I really can’t do!

Honestly (and this is what I’m planning to do when I finally get the nerve up), just tell her that you can’t due to space or that the list is already set. Mind you, if she hasn’t actually said anything to you about being invited- you might just be able to let it go, and not invite her.

Post # 6
1043 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@MaggieL:  Agree!

It’s hard with a smaller office (ours is about the same size).  I’ve already told the group of girls that I hang out with at work that we’re busting at the seams with people we HAVE to invite and therefore neither of us is inviting co-workers.

If the woman asks you point-blank, just tell her that unfortunately your venue only fits so many people and that you aren’t able to invite everyone that you wanted to. 

Side note, it’s so freakin rude for people to assume they are invited or straight-up ask for an invite.  Rude rude rude!   

Post # 7
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

yep, I work with a very close-knit office and I am only inviting people I hang out with outside of work + 2 bosses.

There is like 5-6 people all getting married around the same time, so unfortunately weddings come up alot more than would be normally acceptable. If anyone asks we do have huge space issues, but I don’t see it being a problem. I’m not invited to any of my coworker’s weddings and we’re perfectly cool talking about stuff without it being an issue. 

Post # 8
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I cannot believe how many bees I see who talk about other (sometimes random) people assuming they are invited to their wedding! 

One of my bridesmaids is actually a coworker (though she works remotely and not actually in the office), but besides her, I only invited 1 other coworker that I see outside of work.  I invited some other former coworkers as well. 

Basically I have not talked much about my wedding to anyone at work unless they ask me direct questions.  When they did ask, I gave vague answers and indicated that we are having ‘as small a wedding as possible.’  I think that is how you should respond if this woman keeps asking you questions.

Post # 9
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

I would not invite her. You do not need to give in to that kind of pressure, and you do not need to return the favor of the invitation you received in the past.

Post # 10
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@manako:  so if you invite co-workers do you have to invite your boss…I wouldn’t want to miss a promotion because I didn’t my boss!

I have a co-worker that talks to me all day, everyday about my wedding…only because she has nothing else meaningful to talk to me about – if you know nothing else about this person for the most part then don’t invite her…shes not worth the $200 plate!

Post # 11
1697 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Oh man I feel you! I am inviting my grade level team, my principal and my school secretary. Everyone is so excited for me though and always ask lots of questions. I’m not close to them but I am one of the younger teachers and I feel so bad cause I’m so excited myself about everything I tend to wedding vomit on them sometimes! Maybe if we get no’s I’ll invite them but I’m kinda thinking the no’s should stay no’s to get our numbers down.

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