- 8 years ago
Hello all! I really need some advice. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for well over a year and this summer we decided to stay at school to attend summer classes. I’m from out of state, and my mom and sister came out to get me settled in, and while doing so, my mom mentioned that she (and my dad) thought it would be a good idea if my boyfriend lived with me.
The advice I need, is that my boyfriend’s parents are extremely conservative and have no idea we’re living together. My boyfriend won’t tell them and now that we’re nearing the halfway point of summer, I mentioned that I wanted him to tell his parents we’re living together and that we’d be continuing living together for the next school year (he graduates this year). MY boyfriend is too afraid to talk to them, and knows they’re going to say no.
My parents (obviously) have no issue with us living together, because they trust me to make the right decisions. My boyfriend, however, has not been given that same amount of leeway in his decision making and his parents continue to baby him and question his every motive.
On top of everything, my parents have let my boyfriend stay in the apartment for free (which is roughly $730 a month). I think he should pay something to my parents, because I think it’s crazy that he gets away with not paying rent, utilities, cable, etc. But he can’t pay my parents back without telling his parents of our living situation.
I’m concerned, because my boyfriend’s parents made his sister and her boyfriend get married before they lived together, and I do not want to be given this same ultimatum (especially when we graduate). I find it ridiculous that his parents (who are not very wealthy) would rather throw $600+ away on an apartment (that he’ll never be in) rather than pay half of that and know he’s in a nice location on campus.
I guess overall I think I need help outlining how my boyfriend and I will talk to his parents. I want to be able to have a mature conversation so that we can show his parents we’re capable of living together without them having to worry.
Thanks so much 🙂