(Closed) Advice on the ( +1 ) invitation

posted 9 years ago in Paper
Post # 3
Member
5494 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2011

Here’s my take on this situation and what we will be doing.  I don’t think that anyone can judge on how serious someone’s relationship is.  Some relationships that are over a year are less serious than those of 6 months.  So I think this arbitrary 1 year rule may be hurtful to your guest.  I say give a plus one to anyone who is in a relationship of any kind, (boyfriend, fiance, husband).  Single people don’t get a plus one unless they are travelling from far away or if they wouldn’t know anyone else at the wedding.

When Fiance and i had been dating for about 5 months he was invited to a wedding but I wasn’t because we "hadn’t been dating long enough."  We were both pretty mad that these people were judging our relationship and consequently he decided not to celebrate theirs with them

Post # 4
Member
1357 posts
Bumble bee

We really cut down on the (+1). If we knew the "other" or they had been together a long time, we generally added it. But not always! Bad, I know, but our guest list has ballooned out of control!

Post # 5
Member
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

We are still in the early stages of planning and looking at the guest list, so I’m not 100% sure what we’re doing. But I’m pretty sure we aren’t going to allow any single people plus ones. As for people in relationships, eh.. I’m not sure. Everyone will probably be invited because I know they will RSVP or come as a couple anyway…Sorry that doesn’t help. However if your budget simply cannot accomodate all the extra people, you just have to do the hard thing and not allow it.

Post # 6
Member
9 posts
Newbee

We are picking and choosing who gets a plus one.

All our close friends and family will get a plus one – single or in a relationship.

We have a bunch of guests we HAVE to invite bc they are part of group or friends of family and they not getting a plus one. Simply put I dont really care if they get mad, I honestly wouldnt invite them but I am forced to. So if they are upset, then thats just fine with me, I rather they not show!

 

Post # 7
Member
677 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

We decided that only engaged or married couples would be a plus one…so our friends who are dating don’t get plus one. I’m sure there will be complaints but we had to institute some sort of somewhat fair cut off. Its also to prevent one of my friends from bringing her married boyfriend. As in, married to someone else. We have another friend and her by who without fail manage to have some sort of huge argument at, directly before, or at the end of any wedding they go to…so we wanted to avoid that too. 

Post # 8
Member
267 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - Jewel Box in Forest Park and Windows on Washington

Our thought is that if we don’t know who you are dating then we don’t plan on giving them a plus one.  I have a very large family, so we have to limit it somehow.

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