(Closed) Advice Please! How to conduct a Chinese Tea Ceremony?

posted 6 years ago in East Asian
Post # 4
2533 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@CakeyP:  By the way, sorry if this isn’t a Chinese tea ceremony specifically, my Fiance is half Chinese and I got excited and jumped to conclusions 😛
STILL, I hope that thread helps!
I also found this thread, maybe it will help out further: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/tea-ceremony

Post # 5
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@xakikox:  The links provided by PP are good but I’ll give my input anyway.

You serve the groom’s family first. Both sides of the family should really be in one place out of convenience. If not, again, groom’s family first, not yours.

You serve tea to all the elders, in order of rank (this is determined by age). Your husband’s grandparents are served first, followed by parents, and then eldest uncle and wife, second uncle and wife, etc. Technically you don’t get to pick. I know for my extended family tea ceremony, my mom will probably be the one calling the shots lol.

Post # 6
1 posts
  • Wedding: January 2013

I planned my upcoming tea ceremony based on info from these links and they provide fantastic information. Just be aware though that each province and even each region has its own variations on the tea ceremony too.

My mom did ask me to make some minor changes to my original plans because some elements were just not traditional to our particular region of China. Like the longan and sugar in the tea. Our tradition is plain tea so that’s what I will use.

And check with your elders about which element is more important to them. My own tea ceremony is not following the traditional format but that’s with lots of input and compromise with mom and the aunties.

Post # 7
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

this is how our family usually do it for weddings:

The groom and his entourage goes the bride’s house at the argreed upon time to “fetch the bride”. The younger brother of the bride, or male relative if the bride doesnt have a brother is supposed to open the car door for the groom. The groom in returns gives him a red envelope.

They arrive to the door only to get blocked by the bride’s entourage and bridesmaids, and are then forced to participate in “door games” and/or give them a hefty sum of money to get past, usually 10mins or so, but ive seen it go to 30mins long where the groom has to read a love poem or something silly like that.

Once inside the house, the father of the bride walks her out, same idea as western ceremony. You then serve tea to your parents, then grandparents and etc by rank.The bridal party then goes back to the grooms house to do the same with his parents and family. The bride’s side of the family stays behind and doesnt meet up until reception.

Traditionally, you go from bride’s house then to the groom’s house..and its usually never together in the same household–but nowadays due to different factors and whatnot i’ve heard ppl do it in the same house but it gets really crowded with two families!

It really depends on each of the families traditions and specific regions that they are from. You should check with both sides to make sure.

I actually just brought this up to Fiance the other day and found out that his family does it totally different (even though they’re chinese, their traditions are somewhat more Vietnamese). So now i’m scared that neither parents will back down and want to stick to their own tradition….hopefully they’ll agree on something!

Also, are you doing an engagement or “betrothal”? Thats a whole lot to plan too! >_<

Sorry for the long post. Hope this helps!

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