Post # 1
I’m experiencing an unpleasant situation right now… Please read ahead and give me your advice on how you would handle this! Thank you so much.
[Background: I have only told a couple of girls at work (that are friends) that I’m expecting. Since they have mouths like steel traps, I wasn’t/ am not concerned about them making a peep. Also, I am about 9 ½ weeks.]
Darling Husband and I attended my co-worker’s wedding about 2 weeks ago. My co-worker invited many other people from our office, too. Near the end of the night, everyone from our office awkwardly gathered for a group picture. Nothing could have prepared me for work the next week…
The office loudmouth uploaded the awkward group picture to her work computer and proclaimed that “MrsStrz is pregnant- I know it!”. She told this to several different people in the office (including a couple of my co-workers that are already aware of this) and was attempting to get someone to confirm her suspicions. I think everyone she told reacted to her differently- some laughed and said “no” and others told the loudmouth that she needed to stop talking about it. FYI- The loudmouth concluded that I was pregnant because of the dress I wore and my position in the group photo. I’m sorry that my size 0 dress has pockets that “poof” out…?
I caught wind the other day that she has “confirmed” to a couple of people in the office that I’m expecting…WTF? I don’t even work in the same building as this woman or on the same prosecution team. At this point, I’m at a loss as to how I should handle this. I feel like she’s stolen my thunder and the joy that comes with announcing this amazing news. I was hoping to wait a little longer before announcing, especially because we haven’t had our dating ultrasound yet.
About the loudmouth: She’s 50+ years old and holds a high position in our office. I’ve also heard that she experienced fertility issues years ago.
Post # 3
Just ignore her. Unfortunately she will also be the type to brag ” I knew it” when the word finally does get out in the office. What do you care about what she thinks or does? She is not someone important in your life.
Post # 4
I think there’s little you can do now. I’d let the news die down, and then announce you’re pregnant a few weeks later.
I’d also catch up separately with her (provided she’s not in your line of management) and tell her you don’t appreciate her discussing your personal life with other colleagues (and that basically it’s none of her business).
But that’s just my view – i’m quite confrontational I have to say!
Post # 5
Ugh. How annoying. I am in a sort of similar situation. I have a project manager that I work with that for some reason finds it funny to joke that I’m pregnant. Has been doing so since I got married -HR issues anyone?-. Frankly it’s annoying and I shrug it off but at times I felt like screaming to him do you really think it’s funny? For all you know I could have been trying for months and have issues. Do you think it’s funny then to bring it up to me all the time? Which for months was literally the case.
Today he joked about it again and finally fed up I said something. But it was upon another coworker saying that it was inappropriate and one of these days I’ll give him what for. I said don’t you think it crosses the line and is not really funny? To which he responds oh but then one of these days I’ll just be right! Ugh.
The most annoying part is I am pregnant now and I know he will claim to have guessed it when I do formally announce at work.
Anyway, I guess I would confront her -neither denying or affirming the pregnancy- that you don’t appreciate her spreading rumors around the office that you are pregnant.
As for the thunder part, I think when you do announce it there will still be a ton of excitement because it is coming from YOU and not the office loudmouth!
Post # 6
I wouldn’t do anything differently. Ignore what you’re hearing, what she’s saying. Tell everyone when you’re ready. People will be just as excited/surprised for you when you do. I’m sure your co-workers are smart enough to not take seriously the things being said by someone who is known to have a big mouth.
Post # 7
Thanks for the advice, ladies! (& please keep it coming- I enjoy reading other’s perspectives).
Post # 8
I would ignore it and if anyone asks you point blank (ifyou don’t feel comfortable lying and then having to announce that you are in fact pg a few weeks later) then just say “when I have something to announce, I’ll do so at that time” or something to that effect.
Post # 9
Oh my gosh, every time I think I’ve heard everything on this forum, something like this comes along. I’ve never known or heard of people who behave this way. Then again, I work at home-away from the total jerks. lol
My first reaction was to say to confront her privately. But I think PP are right: Totally ignore her. Don’t say a peep and then when speculation dies down you can pop (ha ha) up and say “Surprise everyone!”. Steal your thunder right back from her. She sounds really jealous and obviously unhappy with her own life.
Post # 10
Wow that is really rude and unacceptable. I would just ignore and actually avoid her, personally I would be offended if someone did that. Thats immature and insensitve and worst of all what if you werent pregnant and had just gained a few pounds. I cant believe she would do that.
Post # 11
i have to agree with @mrsBtoBee: and i would confront her.
Post # 12
Post # 13
@regberadaisy: I would get so sick & tired of that! If Once he makes a stupid comment when you announce, I would bite his head off. He’s fair game for it!
Post # 14
And thanks for the great ideas. I will wait to announce until I am ready and keep on ignoring her! Maybe I will privately approach her afterwards and address it with her at that time.
Post # 15
I do NOT understand people who do this. Unless you (collective you, not specifically the OP) are my sister, I don’t give a crap if you are pregnant. lol. Just ignore her. People say lots of rude things while you are preggers, so might as well start getting your thick skin now. When you announce it, everyone will still be excited and she will still be jealous.
Post # 16
I’d just ignore her and very soon any buzz about you possibly being pregnant will die down. Everyone will still be happy and excited for you when you announce it on your terms.