Post # 1
Ok brides, or bride-to-bees, I need some serious advice/help because I am just so stuck and confused at the moment. I was born and raised in Buffalo, NY. A majority of my family still lives there and now that I live in DC, I am having mixed feelings on where my fiance and I should have the location of our wedding. At first, I was all set to have the wedding/ceremony in DC; we found a great venue, but then the costs started to add up…and not only is it expensive, but through multiple conversations, a majority of my family won’t be able to make the wedding. So, then I was talking to my mother and she suggested having it at this great venue and church in Buffalo. The cost is so much less and a majority of the family members who couldn’t make the wedding in DC, would be able to make it in NY. I’m torn. My fiance says that it will all work itself out and that we will come to a solution. I’m just really stuck. Has anyone else felt like this and what did you do about it? Or if you were me, what would you do? Please help. Any words of wisdom will help. I tried to ask my bridesmaids and Maid/Matron of Honor, but they said the same thing-it doesn’t matter because it will be beautiful and we will all enjoy ourselves.
Post # 3
deciding where to get married was really difficult for fi and me too, and we went back and forth for months.
we live in dc, which is also fi’s hometown, and my hometown is new orleans. either way, half our guests would have to travel. in the end, we decided to have it in new orleans. most of my family has been to dc, but most of fi’s family hasn’t been to new orleans, so it’s a nice destination for them. plus, we’re having a jewish wedding (fi’s family is jewish), so his side gets that and my side gets the location in my hometown…we thought it was a good compromise.
the cheaper cost is a big bonus…weddings get really expensive in dc!
Post # 4
@kitzy: See, most of my family hasn’t been to dc, then again I don’t know if they would enjoy it as much as fi and I do. It’s ridiculous to charge $3000 and up for JUST the venue. And I guess I was naive to catering costs but $10K for 100 people is just absurd. I get that this is supposed to be my special day and all, but really-i’d rather take that money and go on a 2 week honeymoon with my man! How did you do with planning the wedding from several states away? Did your family help out alot?
Post # 5
I completely agree! Costs are I think the biggest things I look for. I understand its my one and only time, but does that really mean I need to spend all my money, without being careful? I would rather spend that extra money on the honeymoon or decor for the new house! I think Buffalo would be a good option for you as most of that family won’t be able to make it either place.
Post # 6
I’m from upstate NY too, and currently live in DC. I’ve been here for 5 years though, and don’t still have a lot of contacts in NY besides family. We’re having the wedding in DC, but it is hard knowing that we could do it for half as much in NY. I think getting married in Buffalo where you’re from would be lovely. The only downside would be planning from far away, but it could definitely be done- especially if you are ok with your Mom helping out.
Post # 7
What do you think best represents you two as a couple? We live in Chicago and always thought we’d do a Chicago wedding, but it’s crazy expensive here too. So when we started pricing it out and realized all the scaling back we’d have to do, the wedding no longer sounded like us. We wanted something much more laid back, but finding laid back in a major city is expensive.
Really, there are so many helpful planning tools out there (WB being one of them) that planning the Buffalo wedding from DC shouldn’t be too difficult.
But if you do go with DC, people may surprise you. After a lot of discussion with our families, we’re doing a Destination Wedding and so many more are going than we expected! I think it will work out either way like everyone says, so logistics and guest list aside, what do you envision for your wedding?