(Closed) After Wedding Rant!!! 19 Gifts- 120 Guests…Wedding No shows/No calls

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
7694 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@bo55y1:  I’m sorry that that happened.  I hope that you enjoyed your wedding day and have many happy memories.  

Post # 4
Member
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I hope you have a thick skin, threads like this generally don’t turn out well. 

 

Sorry you didn’t get many presents!

Post # 5
Member
1262 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

aw man, i wish you would have ended your post with something like “thankfully none of this really matters as i married the man of my dreams.” maybe you will get more in the mail in the coming weeks? sorry about your parents, i imagine that is truly where your pain is. 🙁

Post # 6
Member
247 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

i can see why it would bother you… Darling Husband and i have a lot of younger aged friends (20-23 yrs) and we had FORTY people that rsvp’d not show…

 

it’s life! just remember you didn’t get married for the gifts and the people that made it were the ones that were supposed to be there…

i just tell myself the people that didn’t give anything must need it more than we do!

Post # 7
Member
2488 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i will keep my words soft and sweet incase i have to eat them :S

:/

Post # 8
Member
873 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I too would be livid if my RSVPs did not show. Especially considering that we’re having a smallish guest list of 75 people who we consider close friends and family. You have every right to be upset. Also, as far as I can tell, you’re more upset about people’s lack of ettiquette, not necessarily the gifts.

Post # 9
Member
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I know exactly how you feel. I’ve heard both sides of giving a gift to the bride and groom. One side is the guest is a guest and their presence is their gift. They are there to celebrate your special day. Another side, it’s rude to not bring a gift to a wedding. The bride and groom thought enough to include them and should show appreciation.

I would NEVER come to a wedding without a gift/gift card/money or even a card (handmade if I was broke) as I would never show up empty handed to a baby shower, birthday party or anything I’m invited to. I don’t know what people think, I don’t know if they don’t know better or just don’t give a crap. The people that RSVP’d yes and didn’t show I no longer have respect for and don’t care to have anything to do with them. This may be rude of me but if they would have called me after the wedding and said “I’m sorry I didn’t make it to the wedding. I was sick/in an accident/family emergency/anything else. I’m sure it was beautiful, congratulations”. I heard through the grapevine one guest “fell asleep”. Seriously? The whole wedding/reception you slept? Never woke up and thought “Holy crap, I better get up and get ready”. There were 10 ex co-workers that I’ve seen after the wedding and asked how it was. My answer was “Beautiful” when I really wanted to say “You should have been there and seen it yourself. I mean you RSVP’d yes. You know what yes means as in yes I’ll be there”. As far as the non gift givers I would have appreciated a card, a hand written note. To me that means “Thanks for the awesome hawaiian bbq, all the alcohol anyone could want, the beautiful venue and the kick ass DJ but screw even giving you a Post It with a congrats”

Sheesh, I’ll never understand people. I’m totally sympathetic and am right ther with you.

Post # 10
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Well, crap. Now that I’m thinking about it, we didn’t get ANY presents at the wedding. Are we supposed to? I had two showers….I mean, my parents gave me some cash, and his parents bought us a piece of furniture…..but none of the other guests actually handed us anything..oh well, all I remember is margaritas.

Post # 11
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@MississippiQueen:  haha this made me laugh. My friend is having a margarita machine at her wedding that I’m standing in and I can not wait!

 

OP: I understand you’re upset, but remember that many people mail in gifts and don’t actually bring them to the venue. Also, people have up to a year to send in a gift so don’t worry just yet 🙂 I’m sorry about the no shows that’s one of my big fears for my wedding

Post # 12
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Spade504:  We had an open bar for 30 people and didn’t even hit our contract’s limit….unfortunately our dinner only lasted 3 hours…but I think I got my money’s worth!

Post # 13
Member
504 posts
Busy bee

I can’t imagine attending a wedding without a gift even if it’s just a card with some cash.

Post # 14
Member
2589 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m sorry – I know that hurts.

We had a couple of last minute cancels and 1 no show – and I can’t lie and say it didn’t sting.

As for the gifts – well – that depends. Did you get cards from the other 100?  If not, I absolutely agree thats really rude and hurtful. I have a friend who is unemployed – I had no expectation of a gift from him at all, and he ended up printing a picture he’d taken of us at a party and putting it in a little frame. It probably cost him 4 dollars, but MAN did it make me feel loved and grateful. I get that the economy is tough and not everyone can afford grand gifts – but there are so many free/super cheap things you can do to show the bride and groom you care.

Post # 15
Member
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Spade504 Gotta love those margarita machines. We had one at our wedding and within a few minutes after the ceremony I asked my new husband if he’d get me one. It was sooo yummy.

We even had to send someone out for more tequila because it was so popular. It’s like a Slurpee on alcohol!!!!

Post # 16
Member
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

[Comment moderated for snark/sarcasm]

Don’t forget that it’s about who you’re marrying, not the material stuff that comes along with it. Hell, I just had a bday party for turning 26 and was SHOCKED to see 10 presents! There were 20 people there by the way and I wasn’t expecting a THING seeing as I was only turning 26. I was so grateful that all those people managed to show up, seeing as they have jobs and kids and more important things to do. The way I look at it, the fewer presents, the less hassle of opening them and finding a place in my tiny apartment for them. But hey, to each her own. I, personally, will be MUCH happier knowing that I’m a WIFE than I will about how many stinking presents I got. But that’s just me. Hopefully none of those people who didn’t bring a gift are on WB, otherwise they might never bring you any presents…

The topic ‘After Wedding Rant!!! 19 Gifts- 120 Guests…Wedding No shows/No calls’ is closed to new replies.

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