(Closed) Age-gap relationship (5 or more year)?

posted 5 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 91
Member
464 posts
Helper bee

My fiancé is ten and a half years older than me and I don’t think the age difference has affected our relationship at all! I was 28 and he 38 when we met. I hardly even think about it to be honest.

Post # 92
Member
104 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Historic Mansion

My fiance is 8 and a half years older than I am and we are true soulmates.

Post # 93
Member
408 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

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drizzbee :  my Fiance is 4.5 years older. It works for us! 

Post # 94
Member
274 posts
Helper bee

My Fiance is over 20 years older than me. Because of the age difference, neither of us thought of the other as a possible romantic interest during the first couple of years we knew each other, so we became good friends without the usual agenda of trying to impress each other the way you do when you’re dealing with someone you want to get warm and fuzzy about you. In the beginning, we were both so shocked that the other was interested; I thought he was WAY out of my league and he felt the same way about me. 

The important thing is that he always treats me like an equal and never acts as if his vote counts more than mine because of his age. I actually appreciate his perspective and benefit from his life experience, so I’m often content to defer to him on certain types of decisions. I’ve always been a control freak and have dated irresponsible immature guys that kind of forced me to be THE adult in the house, so this is a huge relief to loosen up on the reins a little.

Post # 95
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2018

Me and my fiance are 18 years apart and we’ve never had an issue.  In fact, when we’re together no one ever looks at us side eyed.  Anyone we meet automatically assumes we are married. Which tells me no one thinks there is an age difference. But really, who cares what anyone thinks? As long as there is no issue between the two of you it doesn’t matter.  Age is just a number anyway. smile

Post # 96
Member
5056 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

My fiance is 10 years older than me. I’m 31 and he’s 41. The only thing I’ve noticed is our talks of having a second child. When we are in the position to have another in a few years, he might not want to as he is older and already has two daughters (he raised three as his ex was pregnant when he met her)

I’m ok if that happens though, he’s worth it and I will be happy if we have another and happy if we don’t.

Post # 97
Member
462 posts
Helper bee

My dad is 16 years older than my mom and they’ve been together for 30 years (met when she was 30, he was 46). It’s never been an issue for them to my knowledge.

I am 5 years older than my SO, and it used to bother me at first but now that we’re years into our relationship I rarely think about it beyond joking here and there between us. I think it’s mostly noticeable for us in the cultural divide – he will mention some show he watched as a kid that I’ve never heard of, for example. Since we’re both in the same stage of life and have the same goals for the future, as well as similar lifestyles, it doesn’t cause problems between us.

Post # 98
Member
5 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: Santiago, Chile

Well I think it depends on the gap. 10 years or more I think are the most unlikely to last, but there are always exceptions! We are all different so maybe the rule doesnt apply in you. Im 27 and my boyfriend is 34. We have been living together for 2 years already and we are very happy. Also I think its important to be friends besides a couple. Of course there are so things, his friends thinks Im practically a baby, but I dont care. We love each other.

Post # 99
Member
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

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ladyvictoria :  Wow I thought our 14 year age difference was big lol I wouldnt change it for the world.

Post # 100
Member
4034 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2016 - Manhattan, NY

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bridetobeonjune3 :  I love comparing our perspectives on different world events or even popular culture at different points in our lives. It’s funny how people think you can’t possibly have anything in common or be attracted to someone 20 years your senior, but my hubby’s a hunk and we’re two peas in a pod lol 

Post # 101
Member
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Lake Louise Canada

20 years difference, from opposite ends of the earth. It’s actually amazing how we NEVER run out of things to talk about because we have such different life experiences. We’re 4 years together, marrying this year.

Post # 102
Member
300 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

FH is 6 years older than I am. I am 35 and he is 41. I dated men of all different ages before I found my love. Ranging from 13 years younger than I am, to 10 years older. I found I was far more compatible with older men, emotionally, and intellectually. Probably because I was raised with a lot of adults around.

I loved what

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victoriad :  said about never running out of things to talk about. (We are also from opposite ends of the earth) Because it is so true!

I look young for my age and he looks a little older, so when we go to small towns (we both love adventuring) we do get the weird looks from time to time. I actually got asked for ID once in a small town because the cop thought I was under-aged. I was flattered and a bit miffed at the same time.

Post # 103
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee

I am 35 and he is 40. The older you get-the less it matters. =)

Post # 104
Member
1227 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016 - Painswick Church and the Falcon Hotel

7 years between us I’m 23 and my husband is 30, I was 18 and he was 25 when we first got together and I remember thinking how great it was to be with a guy that was actually mature most guys I’d been with before were so childish! I think it takes longer for guys to grow up and I always advise people to go for someone abit older. We get along great, he’s a wonderful provider and father to our children  

Post # 105
Member
457 posts
Helper bee

My Fiance is 12 years older than me and I have mixed feelings about it. Honestly I do wish we were a similar age so we would be going through life’s milestones together. Last year I turned thirty and he couldn’t really relate to me saying “wow thirty, I can’t believe it” since he turned forty ages ago. 

He is very fit and works out daily but he still complains about all these getting older aches and pains, which I feel is a little preview in to our future. He hates going out. On the plus side he loves being at home while I go out and happily does all the chores while I am gone!

Socially it’s fine cause most of my friends are with older men. From my circle of friends it seems like if you want to get married and start a family, you have to choose someone much older. I think that’s pretty unfair, but that’s life I guess. In my situation we have been together two years, we are already engaged to be married in June and my partner wants to start TTC now because of his age. Compare to my ex bf who was my same age, after five years together couldn’t even discuss a timeline for moving in with me. 

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