Post # 16
We were newly 34 when we started trying for our first. We only met when we had both just turned 30 and we wanted to wait until we were married for a baby. We got married and waited a year before trying.
I was newly 35 when my son was born.
I don’t think it matters when you try as long as you are ready and can handle the cost of having a baby – ie; steady job, enough room, money for the necessities and the suprises.
Being older and more established has allowed us to buy what we want when we want for our son and not stress about daycare costs along with all of the other costs of life. The downside is that if we wanted 4 kids (we don’t) we probably don’t have enough time to do that naturally. There are pros and cons to everything really.
Post # 17
Started TTC at 29 and had my daughter just shy of my 31th. We wanted to try sooner but moved to a HCoL area and needed to bank some money first. So we started trying after our 4th anniversary. Now my brother has four kids at 29. But they had all her family around to use as daycare so that they could continue to establish their careers while raising little ones.
Post # 18
I started a few months ago at 34. It took me that long to find the right person, get married, etc. My husband is 5 years younger so he was a little behind me on being ready for all the big milestones. Having very regular cycles and the fact that my mom has her last kid in her mid-forties kept my anxiety at bay until we actually started trying.
I do wish I could have started much earlier. I’ve always wanted a large family (4+ kids) and I have to accept that it probably isn’t in the cards, at least with natural conception. Maybe we will turn to adoption to grow our family.
Post # 19
I was 31 and D.H. was 30 when we started TTC, took about 9 months to conceive. I am due next month and I am 32 / D.H. will be 31 when we have the baby. We want a second child but due to complications, I need to wait at least 1.5 years so I assume second child will be born when we are around ~34-35 which is pretty much my limit of when I want to be done anyway.
We got married in 2016 (on our 5 year dating anniversary) at 29/28 and waited two years because I was in a master’s degree program for 2 years. If I didn’t go to grad school, we would have TTC sooner since we were nearing 30s but it was important to me to get the degree before we brought more chaos into the family.
Post # 20
31 for first, 34 for second. I really would have liked them sooner, but I wanted to do the wedding thing first. I got false positives on various screening tests with my first, with age being a factor that caused that to happen. I also had one miscarriage. Not sure if age-related or not. I was pretty happy I qualified for NIPT to start with for my second (due to age), because it saved me all that stress. Still pregnant with my second, but as far as I know, my kids are healthy.
Post # 21
I think it also totally depends on where you’re living and what the average seems to be there. Hubby and I started trying basically on my 30th birthday (he was 34) and were lucky enough to conceive on the first try. I’m 28 weeks now. My other friends my age are juuuust beginning to think about TTC in the next year or so, but we all have post grad degrees (and wanted to finish school before getting married and TTC) and are living in a ridiculously HCOL area, so it took some time to get into apartments etc that would have enough room for a kiddo! I would imagine if we were college sweethearts living in a lower cost of living area that might have changed things. Regardless, I think if you’re comfortable in your finances and are ready…then you likely are! 🙂
Post # 22
We started trying this year when we were both 27, my husband will be 28 in less than a month. I didn’t have irregular periods but did just get off BC, I had the concern of it taking a long time to get pregnant, but if it happened right away we were going to be more than happy with that too. It ended up happening on the first try and I’m 21 weeks. I haven’t had anyone comment we’re too young, if anything we would always get a million questions about when we were going to have kids. You just have to feel ready and that’s all that matters!
Post # 23
we just started trying at age 33 mostly due to graduate school/job related factors (although we met at age 28, so couldn’t have started much earlier than we are now). personally, i wasn’t ready to be a mom at age 26. most of my friends were single and liked to travel, go out to eat, etc. and i think i would have felt like i was “missing out” if i had to stay home with a baby. now i don’t feel that way at all– i am excited to start a new chapter of life as a family and do kid-friendly things with my weekends etc. but if you feel ready now, then its the right time for you! only you can make that decision.
Post # 24
My husband was 36, I was 37 (turns out roughly the exact same age as my mother when she started trying to have me!)
I wouldn’t have had it any other time because at other stages it would have hindered things we really wanted to do.
Post # 25
Pretty young. I was 25 and my husband was 23 when we first started ttc. We had our son at 27 and 25. I’d always wanted to be a mother. I got married at 23 and would have started ttc right then and there, but we waited until my husband finished college and got a stable job before ttc.
Post # 26
We are both 31 and just started a few months ago.
Post # 27
I hate when people place arbitrary age limits on life events such as marriage or having children. I know couples who were married at 19 & 23 and have one of the strongest marriages I’ve seen! They also had a baby 11 months after getting married. I also know a couple who didn’t get married until 28 & 32, and it’s another strong marriage with a baby after about a year together. It’s all about the couple themselves and whether they believe they are ready for [xyz].
My perspective: I think people should be getting married and having children younger than the current trend. That colors what I have to say, but I also don’t harrass people who choose to wait longer because it’s not my business.
We started TTC (and were successful the first month! Yikes! Weren’t expecting that!) at 26 & 25. If you’ve thought it through and have at least a rough plan of how you’ll provide for the baby, go for it! Life changes with a little one, but it’s not over. 🙂
Post # 28
I was 38 when we started TTC. I would have started earlier but I didn’t met DH until I was 36 🙂
Post # 29
I’m 25 and I’d start trying now if it were feasible. Myhusband would prefer to start having babies in 2 ish years.
Post # 30
You guys all make really good points! I guess it really does depend on what stage you are in life rather than age. We are ready (as ready as you can be!) and our families have been asking us. It is more co-workers who have made comments like “enjoy your youth” “you have so much time” “why rush it” etc. I know I shouldn’t care about the opinions of others, but it just had me feeling self conscious about wanting that now. I’m honestly so happy to see such an age rage though. It makes me feel better 🙂