Post # 1
So, all this debate about the cash/open bar made me think of something. I am having my wedding at a winery in northern california and we are ONLY allowed to serve wine, beer and champagne. Even though we new some of our friends only like hard alcohol, we accepted.
Also, the wedding can only take place at this venue between 6 30 and eleven, so we are having an after party at the hotel that everyone is staying at till two. It will only be us in the hotel bar.
Is it rude for me not to pay from drinks then? Should we buy the first round? I am inviting everyone there……..
Post # 3
I dont think its even close to your responsibility at an after party. Its nice, but in no way is it needed or expected.
EDIT We had an “after party” at the hotel bar but paid for no drinks. We did however provide a few trays of meatballs and something else (I forget) for late night snacks. People thought they were great, but no one expected it.
Post # 4
I don’t think it’s your responsibility at all. People will expect to pay for their own booze at a bar I think. Buying the first round would be a nice thing to do though.
Post # 5
Agreed. I think a “after party” is more of a after the wedding lets all get together. No obligation to provide any booze nor would I expect it since you are already providing so much at the winery!
Post # 6
We’re having our after party at a brewery thats right across from our venue and our guests are on their own. Maybe we’ll buy a round or two (lets see how much we have to shell out for our final venue bill first) but we’re certainly not picking up the tab. After being wined and dined at the reception, I highly doubt anyone expects the bride and groom to cover their drinks at the after party.
Post # 7
I agree with PP’s. Not your responsibility. Buying the first round would be EXTRA NICE! But not expected in my opinion. The After Party — people should be buying you shit!
Post # 8
I think buying the first round would be nice. But after that people should be on their own!
Post # 9
No, not your responsibility, BUT I would make this clear beforehand that you are not hosting the after-party and that the guests are on their own for drinks. I wouldn’t even start out buying the first round because that might confuse people as to who’s paying.
Post # 10
It depends on how yo are inviting people to it. If you are including it on the invite it is an extension of the party (just in a seperate location) and is still within the scope of you as hosts.
If it is a more casual, “oh hey sally, groom and I will be going to XYZ tavern following the wedding, hope to see you there” verbally at the wedding I think it is a seperate party and guests are on their own.
Post # 11
I accidentally clicked buy the first round, but seriously, I don’t think anyone should have to provide booze at a wedding.
Post # 12
NO way! You’re providing the alcohol for the entire reception, among other things. You are absolutely not responsible for their drinks after the party, imo.
Post # 13
No one has to come to the after party if they don’t want to, and they don’t have to drink if they don’t want to. I don’t think it’s your responsibility to buy anyone drinks. It’s nice if you can afford it, but not neccesary.
Post # 14
I think 6:30 – 11 is a decent enough time for guests to enjoy themselves and get quite liquored up! Its nice that you are planning an after party but I dont think it should be formal. Just you guys headed to the bar. If anything, maybe they will buy you guys drinks!