(Closed) "All weddings I'VE ever been to…" Need to vent

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@Ashley_B:  i’m not having a veil either and i love the “you won’t look like a bride” comment…pretty sure the big white dress might give it away. lol

Post # 18
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

wow, a girlfriend actually said that about a groomsman walking down the aisle with another girl…im sorry but BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH what a freak

Post # 19
25 posts
  • Wedding: September 2012

@bostongirl27:  Love it! I also plan on dancing with my dad to a classic rock song…we both love classic rock and I think we’d both be rolling our eyes if it was Butterfly Kisses or something similar!!!


View original reply
@Sunnyday278:  We weren’t going to have flowers either (other than my bouquet) until my in-laws offered to pay for it last week! Now all of my bridesmaids will have bouquets, the moms and grandmas will get some form of flowers, and the groomsmen, dads, and grandbas will get boutonnieres! Otherwise I had planned on making fabric bouquets or something…but time is running out!!!


Post # 20
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

People love to lecture, don’t they? I especially love it when people say “I don’t think you want that!” Thank goodness we have the wedding police around to help us, huh.

If it helps, I’m getting married on a Friday afternoon, I have a flowergirl and no ring bearer, and the bridesmaids are walking up individually. Re the bridesmaids, tell them it’s the British way of doing it, nobody has them walk with groomsmen here.

Post # 21
3260 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

ALL the things you talk about besides the last 2 points, I AM DOING! People like to have their annoying opinions.

Post # 22
1953 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

HAHAHAHA “I’m having them walk down the aisle at the end of the ceremony, not giving them a hotel key and telling them to consummate a friendship.” I love that!

You know what my favourite line is to say to people whenever I someone says “you have to do this” or “Any wedding i have been to does this”

If you would like the pleasure of paying for my entire wedding, then I will change that detail to be more appropriate to how you feel it should be, if not, shut up!

Post # 23
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’ve had people tell me I’m doing it wrong, or I simply MUST include blah-blah-blah. Frankly, I don’t specifically remember, as I tend to nod my head and half-listen. Then I file it in the appropriate circular file in my head and move on with my day.

I do remember not to tell them anything in the future, too. Let em be surprised. What kind of jerk is going to come up to you after the fact and say “Well, you should have done xyz”? And if they do, look worried for a moment, look at your wedding ring, let out a theatrically relieved breath, and say “I’m still married, so it’s all good”. Then enjoy the memories 🙂

Post # 24
1956 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Thank you for posting this! I’ve had several people tell me that I shouldn’t do this or that and it’s rather frustrating.

My mother (whom I love to pieces) suggeted that I wear a simple, understated dress since it’s my second wedding and I agreed with her in theory (and because I normally wear classic styles) but the dress I fell in love with is a huge lace and tulle ball gown that’s approximately the size of a circus tent. I’m not sure how she’s going to react when she sees my dress. 

Also, I’ve had several ladies ask about hosting a bridal shower and I’ve had to politely decline their offers. I simply don’t want one. It’s enough for me that they will all be there to share in the joy of our wedding day with us. I don’t want or need extra attention or gifts. 

We’re not doing a garter or boquet toss. We’re not having any type of unity ceremony (umm, that’s what the vows are for), and we’re not having any readings. We’re not having bridesmaids or groomsmen; just Fiance’s 2 daughters and our 2 dogs as attendants and ring bearers, respectively. It’s the second time around for both of us and we want it to be about us, not what everyone else thinks/does/did.

Whew! I needed to get that off my chest. 

Post # 25
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I had a busload of wedding police. I noticed that they were all the ones who DIDN’T come to the wedding. And now that some have seen pictures, they are SO excited to tell me what I did wrong.

*”why did you wear that sweater on the beach? It’s too hot for sweaters!!” I wore an aqua cardigan over a cami with a huge tattered skirt…and how do they know how hot is on the beach when they were NOT THERE? Being warm for 15 minutes so I had the “look” I wanted for my beach wedding was worth it to me. I actually wore it the whole night and was totally fine.

*”You should have had your hair and makeup done by a professional!!” Um, we were getting married on the beach and I wanted super messy hair with a big Ol’ flower in it. And that’s exactly what I had. Move along. My makeup was plain foundation, super super mascara (It was amazing but not waterproof called Fake Lashes something or other), some bronzer, some eyeshadow..whatever. Were you there? Ok then. Did you want to pay for someone to come over and do my makeup? Let me know for next time.

*”You can’t expect people to just stand on the beach while you say your vows!!” Want to bet? Because that’s what they all did, and no one was offended. They could have hauled their beach chairs over there if they wanted to, but it was 15 minutes of their life, and no one cared as much as you do. But thanks for not coming anyway.

All these were from one grandmother, who didn’t come. If I had makeup, chairs, and no cardigan, would she have come? Um, no. So thanks for your suggestions. AFTERWARDS.

My favorite was, “Who paid for all that food?” We did, Granny. Again, were you there? Mind your own business. Naysayer.

Post # 26
24 posts
  • Wedding: July 2012

Ahh! I’ve heard of so many of the same things.

Plus the ‘no one is going to notice that anyway’ well, I will! Obviously, if that detail is important enough for me and I can make it happen, then let it be! In my opinion the cutest things about weddings are the little things! 

Also, I have bridesmaids (1 in specific) that likes to tell me what would be most convenient for her. ” So you’re definitely not having us sit at the head table boy – girl – boy – girl, right? Because we might not know the groomsmen very well and that would not be fun’  Well, sorry to inconvenience you but the thing is you’ll only be sitting down for like 15 minutes while you eat. Don’t talk to the people you sit by if you don’t want to. ‘Oh Thank GOD you are not having a full Catholic mass, sorry but I would not be standing for that whole thing.’  Excuse me? I am Catholic, so even though I’m not having a full mass, that’s still kind of insulting.  Secondly, if it’s such a chore, why did you accept in the first place?

These are just a few of many things that people find important to comment on or try to force.

Post # 27
1839 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

yeah i get this… i even got some from my coordinator.

included in my package is a limo service for 4 hours. i told my coordinator that after the ceremony i wanted the limo to take the kids and the one guardiant looking after them that night back to their hotel and then that’s it. i wanted to take a bus from the hotel to the restaurant with all my guests.

we got into an argument because i’m the bride and i’m supposed to be pampered. i should take the limo while everyone else takes the bus. But that’s not what I want…. I want to have fun on the bus with all my friends and family in a giant poofy dress, darnit!

After going back and forth in e-mails, I finally got her to send a BEO plan with the limo service written out the way I want it.


And my mom over and over again “you don’t really want all the kids there, do you?” “yes” “but they will interrupt. mason has new medication, but he still is wild.” “mother, I’m having them dress up as pirates and princesses. i fully expect a sword fight to break out in the middle of my vows and i will cherish the photo memories that come of it.” then she just looks at me like i’m crazy for wanting kids to be kids.

Post # 28
320 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I have a groomsmen in my wedding and his wife said the same thing about him walking…..I was like if it’s going to cause confusion then he dosen’t need to be in it.

Post # 29
1281 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

your last point made me laugh im sorry 🙁 and im sorry that everyone is giving you a hard time

Post # 30
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

You could turn it back around on them!


“Well, with all the weddings I have been to, the others involved in it weren’t such nosey pains in the ass”…….


Prepare to take cover if that line is used in the presence of a Future Mother-In-Law. It didn’t go over well with mine LOL

Post # 31
1263 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Ashley_B:  Haha, this reminded me of a conversation my sister and I had the other day – She’ll wear the dress and veil at the wedding and see how long it takes my fiance to notice. And whether he objects…he’ll be in trouble if he just shrugs his shoulders and goes “Myeah, you’ll do.”

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