Post # 1
so, backstory. I got engaged end of June this year, and we waited 6 weeks before asking our friends, just to be sure, and it gave us lots of time to discuss our plans, etc.
I chose my three closest friends and felt good about my choice. We are two women getting married here, so my fiance’s wedding party is all female as well, including her sister.
However, recently I got into an email discussion with my sister-in-law, my brother’s wife, and in it came out her feelings of not being close to me because I didn’t make an effort to get to know her. I always thought we weren’t close because, geographically, we were never close! i’m talking a seven hour drive for the first three years of their relationship, and now on the other side of the country for the last eight. I really like her, but it’s just that, we’re not emotionally close.
Thing is, I’d like to be closer. My bro is doing photos day of, and I know they are super excited to come out for the wedding. In fact, we’ve been Skyping more in the last 6 months, and it feels good to be more connected to them.
Now I’m wondering if I should ask her to be a bridesmaid? She’s old friends with another gal on my side, so it wouldnt’ be awkward that way. I’m hoping she’d be out the week of for the bachelorette party and stuff, and I have another Out of Town Bridesmaid or Best Man. (these short forms crack me up)
what do you think? no one’s pressuring me, just wonder if it could get us on a good track to becoming better friends?
Post # 3
after a day of thinking about this, I realize that I shouldn’t “use” this to get closer to her. Besides, they still live in the Eastern US, whereas I’m on the west coast of Canada.
but I’d like to include her in some special way, I’m just not sure what it is…
Post # 4
Wow, I was just going to post on something similar! I chose my bridal party, but haven’t told them yet, and I already have one more bridesmaid than my fiance does groomsmen. My brother just told me he’s going to get engaged over Christmas, so now I”m wondering if I should ask my future sister in law to be a bridesmaid as well. We’re on opposite coasts, so I don’t know her very well, but she’s sweet and I’m sure we would be closer if we were geographically closer. One thought I had was to have her do a reading in the ceremony. That might be a consideration for you as well!
Post # 5
@Tigrrlily04: that’s a good suggestion. same as you, i will be spending time with both my bro and his wife over the holidays, so I think I’m going to “feel it out” then and make the call.
Post # 6
@mtnhoney: I’m on the same boat as you.. I’m thinking if i should ask my future SIL over christmas break to be my Bridesmaid or Best Man.. I have 4 BMs who are my close friends.. Fiance has 5 Groomsmen and his brother also the best man, suggested I has his sister so it’d be even.. I”m not close to her but I thought since we’ll be family I might..
good luck on making your decision 🙂