Post # 1
Already engaged/married ladies, how long was it before you got engaged after having your first serious marriage conversation?
I was visiting the parents and my mother of course asked a series of awkward questions regarding my and SO’s marriage plans. SO and I had our first serious marriage talk about three months ago and I’m not expecting a proposal anytime soon but my mother thinks that 3 months should have been more than enough time for SO to process the conversation and ‘get his shit together’. I’m not going to be pushing SO (I’ve said my peace. He knows I want to get married so I’m just waiting for him to get to the same point). But I was curious.
How long did it take your SO to propose after your first serious marriage discussion?
Post # 3
I answered immediately, but we had had a conversation about eventually getting married 1 year and a few breakups/makeups prior to that.
Post # 4
I waited about 2 years. It was dreadfull but worth the wait. Now only 7 and a half more months till the wedding.
Post # 5
Another thought, sorry if this comes off as harsh, but I hope this poll isn’t going to be used as a gauge for how quickly your SO *should* propose. Every relationship is so different, and I’d hate to see you (or your mom) get all worked up if you find a high percentage of immediate or 1 year proposals from this poll.
I know it’s easier said than done, but if he’s ready, and you’ve talked about it, he’ll do it when he’s ready- try not to torture yourself by comparing your unique relationship to anyone else’s.
Also, it’s not yo momma’s business 😉
Post # 6
It was pretty much decided upon when we first started dating, but I was hesitant ( I had issues with marriage then got over it eventually) and our financial situation wasn’t the greatest. 3 years later he proposed, 2 years later we got married.
Basically, there is no time limit in my opinion. Like I said marriage was never a big deal for me. Whatever feels right for both of you is the best.
Post # 7
He surprised me by asking me to ring shopping last September, but he didn’t propose til March. That said we hadn’t been dating long.
Post # 8
I don’t remember exactly, but I think it was about three months. Hopefully, there was a sense of urgency since we knew that if we wanted to get married this year, there was only one weekend that would work.
Post # 9
@bells219: No I’m not trying to guage how fast anyone’s SO should propose from this poll. I’m just a numbers person and I find things like this interesting. I’ve got a 5 year timeline regardless of how my mother feels about it. But she does make me think about things that I didn’t consider before.
Post # 10
@NoOneYouExpect: Fair enough. I like the numbers too 🙂 I just get so sad for the waiting bees that torture themselves thinking something will or should happen, and then getting disappointed when it doesn’t.
Post # 11
Yeah I probably shouldn’t bother with the bee. (5 years is a long time after all) But I enjoy reading the happy stories people have. It’s a very supportive online community and it’s a bit of a rarity.
Post # 12
I voted 33-36 months. We started discussing buying a house together in early 2007, and the contingency of even considering it was that we both knew marriage was the eventual outcome, and that we would get engaged within the year of moving in together. We moved in together in August 2007, and things got a little ugly once January 2009 came and he still hadn’t officially proposed… but we ended up getting engaged in October 2009, and married July 2010.
Post # 13
We talked about marriage about 9 months into the relationship… And i waited another 6 years before getting engaged. We are getting married 3 months off our 7 year anniversary.
Post # 14
I think we were right at 3 years when we got engaged. We’ve been together for 10 years at the end of this month. We’re getting married next year in June.
So my fiance moved out of state 3 years ago and I followed shortly after. The first day I moved in I found the ring in his closet. I wasn’t looking or anything but thought the closet looked disorganized and wanted to straighten it a little. LOL. I took the ring and wore it for the past 3 years because I’m not a big on waiting. No proposal though.
3 years later we got engaged. We had a new ring custom made for my engagement ring and the original e-ring will be my wedding band.
I always ask wth he was doing with an e-ring since it took him 3 years. He says he knew it wasw what he wanted and he just wanted to wait until we were really ready.
In the end I’m extremely glad we waited. We’re going to have a fabulous wedding that we could not have afforded 3 years ago. We’ve grown a lot the past 3 years and will be 27 when we get married…a good age we think!
Post # 15
Once he finally got me to agree to marriage (8 years into our relationship…), it took 4 months! It was quick once I was ready. 🙂
Post # 16
We dated in 2007, and broke up. Then started dating again in 2010, but since we had stayed close the whole time, we started talking marriage right away. A ring was in the works, but then we both lost our jobs. It took awhile for us to get back on our feet, and the ring was his first purchase, a couple months after getting a new job. So, technically, it was about 2 years, but if he hadn’t lost his job, a few months.