Post # 1
I’m only about 3 months into the planning for our May 2011 wedding and i’m already feeling stressed and overwhelmed!! My FH hates that i’m feeling this way, but this is just kinda how i react, and he is way more relaxed about everything(it’s sort of annoying). i’m constantly thinking about things for the wedding, things we still need to do, things i could make better….just always thinking. He tells me to turn off my brain, it just doesn’t work that way!
I know our family and friends are excited for us and for the wedding, however, i am so sick of answering the same questions over and over and over everytime i see them! I’m constantly thinking of the wedding when no one else is around, that when we go for visits i don’t want the only topic to be about what i’m already thinking about…does that even make sense? It’s like i have more going on in my life than just a wedding(well not much more lol) that we can talk about other things.
I’ve definitely stepped back this week away from the planning and i can tell i’m not feeling as overwhelmed, but i’m still thinking….ugh! and i know it’s only gonna get worse(i figure anyways) I just want everything to be perfect and run smoothly(even though i’m gonna guess it doesn’t always happen that way, no matter how much you plan and stress over every detail).
Any tips on how to make myself no go completely nuts?!
*end of rant…sometimes it feels good to vent:o)*
Post # 3
Are we the same person? I think so!! Our FIs sound similar too. I don’t have much advice for you since I haven’t quite figured out how to calm myself down yet. Ugh!
Post # 4
@OttawaBride2011: LOL! it’s so frustrating how i feel like i’m running around like a crazy person stressing over every detail and he’s like “eh, nothing to stress about” and just so casual about it…it’s irritating! lol
Post # 5
@sarbear2814: Yes! Mine is exactly the same way. And he just wants me to have everything I want, so he offers no opinions, even when I really really need them!!! I am an anxious person by nature, so this whole wedding planning thing is not good… haha.
Post # 6
It really helped me to fill my time reading/working out/doing something totally un-wedding related to fill my head up with other stuff.
Post # 7
I would say try to write ideas down, save pictures online that you like, chat through ideas on boards like this or with any friends or family that are into it. I think it’s normal to think about your wedding a lot but if you have to talk about it in front of your fiance who probably isn’t that into flowers and favors then I would try to stick to topics that he might have an interest in (in my case – the food and honeymoon).
Post # 8
I’ve been planning for 8 months now (two more to go), and I will tell you that the obsession is normal. There are hundreds of decisions to make, big and small, and it really does tend to take over all your waking (and sometimes sleeping!) thoughts. That is perfectly normal, so accept it. If you can manage to set aside specific times to stop focusing on it, you should – maybe declare that one or two days a week you will NOT do any planning, and busy yourself with something else. If your family asks questions on those days, politely tell them you’re taking a break that day, and please ask tomorrow. 🙂
There are ways, however, to manage your overwhelm. You need to get yourself organized if you haven’t already. Some brides use notebooks or binders; I used a spreadsheet combined with folders on my computer (for inspiration pictures). I blogged about it here: http://www.getmarried.com/wedding-blog/2010/09/24/spreadsheets-to-keep-me-sane/
The biggest thing I did was to customize my own monthly to-do list based on various timelines and checklists I found online. None of them worked as-is for me, and it was hugely helpful to create my own. For the first several months I focused only on that month’s to-do list, so I wouldn’t be overwhelmed with the big picture. I knew that as long as I was making progress according to my plan, I would be okay.
Now that the date is getting closer, I broke down the monthly list into weekly lists. As long as I can check off my weekly items, I am still managing to feel in-control. I have had to push some things into future weeks, but that’s okay because I kept the last 2-3 weeks very light in my original plan (knowing that I would have spillover).
Hope this helps – and good luck!