Post # 1
Be prepared for a rant, ladies.
First off, I have never asked any of my bridesmaids to so much as lift a pinky for me. I never gushed to them about all the little details of my ever so important day, never asked for help planning, never asked their opinion about crap I know they don’t care about. We haven’t had a typical bride to be/bridesmaids relationship and maybe it is MY fault for not including them more and maybe this is why they feel distant. I am 8 days from my wedding and they’ve been talking for weeks about having a bachelorette party type thing for me (I don’t drink or go to clubs so it’s more like a bridal shower than anything else). Nothing is difinitive and the only day that would work with my schedule would be this Sunday (the Sunday before the big day) but my sister (maid of honor) works ALL day on Sundays. Anyway, it’s just not going to work and their planning has been one big clusterfuck. They can’t communicate with each other and there has just been tons of drama about it. One bridesmaid has really been annoying me. She made a comment that my expectations have been too high for them planning me something. I am sorry if assuming they could put together a small lunch with five people is too high a standard. I am really on a high horse, thank you for pointing that out dear bridesmaid. She makes comments about how she thinks the REALLY simple black bridesmaid dress I picked is ugly. She said to someone that she can’t wait until the wedding is over because I have been so crazy. One of my coworkers made the comment that I was the calmest bride she’s ever known. How my bridesmaid who hasen’t even been involved has seen the crazy side is a mystery. Yes, I am acting insane right now because I am angry and upset because of all the stupid comments she’s made. I have never shown this side in front of anyone and really needed to rant.
Post # 3
well it sounds like you are upset with one bridesmaid in particular rather than all of them. Perhaps part of the reason the rest of the them have had trouble planning something is also because of her?
I would talk to her, give her an out if she really doesn’t want to be in the wedding. You don’t want someone standing up next to you on your wedding day that doesn’t really want to be there.
As for the bachelorette, you may have to compromise and not have all of your maids there. Is your sister the one who you want most to be there? Then pick a night when she can come, let the girls know the date, if they can make it, great, if they can’t, well that sucks, but oh well. My Maid/Matron of Honor couldn’t even come to my bachelorette, and I still had a blast.
Post # 4
From what you’ve said- it doesn’t sound like you’re asking too much at all. Maybe you guys can do dinner during the week instead on lunch on Sunday? Maybe they don’t feel included and have had it ‘easy’ the whole time so now that they have a responsibility, they feel overwhelmed or like ‘why should i?’, you know? Not that thats right- just an idea!
Are you guys having slumber party Friday night? Maybe you guys can turn that into a bit of a party?
Post # 5
I think you need to back up and slow down for a moment.
- On Sunday you should have your sit down lunch as “planned”. If your sister can’t make it, then sorry. She can’t call in sick or leave for a few hours? I think the group needs to have this time. You definitely NEED this lunch, and so do your BM’s.
- t sounds like your sister could not plan something that works with your busy schedule, so YOU should have asked someone else to plan the lunch. Now I think YOU need to do it instead.
- Some people really LOVE to be involved. By not including people and letting them know “whatsup” you’re pretty much excluded them. Most women LOVE love love weddings, crafting, and being INVOLVED! I think you may have hurt their feelings over that. Everyone loves getting their opinion asked, it is your day but the whole point of bridesmaids is to have help.
- You would be amazed at how far a simple please and thank you will go even if you feel it’s not deserved.
I think your acting bridezilla now, but I think you have hurt your BM’s and maybe even you MOH’s feelings. If I was one of them I honestly wouldn’t feel like I owed you an appology, or that I should accomdate you for your brunch.