Post # 1
So basically I’m a little hurt and I don’t know if it’s really warranted or not.
I recently asked a friend to be a bridesmaid for me which she was happy to do (not ecstatic, but happy). This was about 3 weeks ago.
Last night she posts a pic of herself on facebook wearing a ‘maid of honor’ sash and crying saying ‘OMG’ ‘My answer is YES!’ ‘Please excuse my puffy eyes from crying!’. To be honest, she is closer with the other girl, but I still felt this was a little over the top.. And had little regard for my feelings. When I asked her she wasnt even half that excited (i understand for this other girl she is the Maid/Matron of Honor and for me she is a bridesmaid. She would not expect to be my Maid/Matron of Honor in any case so it’s not that she expected me to ask her to be my MOH)… after seeing the status I was pretty hurt..
Now don’t get me wrong, I am definitely no bridezilla, it’s not about the attention going onto this other girl or jealousy or anything like that. I’m just a little upset she was sooo excited for this other girl and I got nothing like that. I’m not going to get mad at her or say anything as I don’t have the right. But I just wanted to get your opinions, am I being too sensitive? Or would you be offended too?
Post # 2
- Wedding: December 2014 - Loft
I think your feelings are hurt because she didnt make as big of a deal about being in your wedding? I can see where you are coming from. In terms of being “allowed” to be offended only you can decide that. It might hurt my feelings but as my mom would say. It’s not a competition.
Post # 3
I would not be offended. I would never post anything like that myself, but apparently your friend would.
Post # 4
i would probably be a little irratated ….because i think that is a natural knee jerk reaction. but it does not mean it is justified. quite often things anger us and we need to reframe it and let time calm us. however, i think if you wait a few weeks until the post is no longer in your face, you’ll be less upset.
one question… are the two weddings around the same time? is part of your upset actually fear that she will now not prioritize your wedding and will neglect things for your wedding as a result?
Post # 5
I guess you’re allowed to feel however you want but if she’s closer to the other girl AND Maid/Matron of Honor who cares? This isnt grade school. With that said I think everyone can admit to having some sort of crazy feelings at times whether they admit to it others or not….
Post # 6
I might be a little miffed, but wouldn’t hold it against her.
Post # 7
- Wedding: February 2017 - Seattle, WA
If anything I would think it was odd that she posted a pic of herself crying…. is that normal to cry when being asked to be someone’s MOH? Lol I’ve never seen that reaction before.
Post # 8
I would release her from being in my bridal party because as maid of honor and will be spending all her time on helping that bride.
Post # 8
I would actually be glad she didn’t post that over the top pick about my wedding. I think if I was the other bride I would be embarssed. Way too over the top for my taste.
Post # 10
Candice1990: I think it’s a little over the top she posted a picture of herself crying and we all definitely have unjustified crazy irrational feelings sometimes but I would let it go, not worth getting upset about when you’re about to begin planning a wedding where a million other things will upset you.
Post # 11
Candice1990: Of I would be offended if I were in your shoes. I would probably whine about to Fiance, nurse my wounds, and eventually move on.
Post # 12
Thanks all for your opinions, most of you have said what I thought too. I should try not to let it bother me. =
missjz: Yep youre pretty right, I guess I am upset cause she didnt make a big deal about mine. But I guess thats just me being jealous.
julies1949: Neither would I!!
Jenny1984: Yeah Im sure I will get over it in a few days. Not sure when the other girls wedding is but I will try to find out. That is a good point and maybe I am.. But to be honest I dont really need her help.
gelaine22: Yeah true… I guess thats why Im on here, admitting it to people I dont know!! Haha.
Kings7911: Yeah I dont know, I havent seen it either!! I definitely wasnt expecting tears when I asked but a little more excitement would have been nice?
yumcheez: You have no idea how tempting that is… I will gage how she acts when I see her and make a decision from there… Ill try to make that decision when Im feeling more rational…..
future.mrs.koban: True.. Youre probably right… I need to move on.
nawella: You pretty much defined the rest of my week.
Post # 13
I think I’d only be offended if the two of us were really close and I’d asked her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor then she posted that reaction to being asked to be someone else’s bridesmaid -but not MOH- and also if I was pretty confident that she and the other bride weren’t very close.
Post # 14
I get feeling hurt, but I doubt very much she wanted to hurt you. Unless one or both of the brides are bridezillas, I don’t see why she can’t be in both parties. “Releasing” her from her obligation would be an extraordinarily nasty and stupid thing to do unless she actually asks to step down.
Post # 15
Her reaction to being the Maid/Matron of Honor for the other girl is definitely ove the top however, I wouldn’t be offended. You have to keep in mind that not everybody is going to be as excited as you for your upcoming wedding. Not to worry though…the bee is great for that! :o)