(Closed) Am I allowed to be upset? :

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

try talkin to ur dad and find out whats goin on

 

Post # 4
Hostess
8576 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think you are allowed to be upset to an extent.. however.. I’m guessing your wedding is rather far away. If you really want him there maybe you can offer to help?

My father is very short on cash, so I will be renting his hotel room. Usually, this is not done.. but I would like him there. Sometimes you have to do, what you have to do.

Post # 7
Member
11422 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

@jamiesaltkill:  

I wouldn’t get upset based only on hearsay. I would speak directly with your father to find out if his plans have changed. It’s possible that your grandmother misunderstood or is unclear as to your father’s plans.

Post # 8
Member
11270 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@jamiesaltkill:  it’s difficult when the wedding is not local.  unfortunately not everyone can travel.  i would definitely talk to your dad and see if you can find out what the issue is.  if it is financial, perhaps you can assist him.

Post # 10
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m in the midwest too, and the weather here is unpredicatable in winter. I think alot of people were fooled into thinking winter wasn’t so bad because last year was so mild and warm. But we have already been snowed in a few times already.

I think you have a right to be upset, if you have always pictured certain people there, and suddenly they drop this news. I think it was wrong of her to mention your dad, if he is not coming, he should tell you that himself, rather than g-ma starting a terrible rumor and upsetting you.

Post # 11
Member
1102 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I would talk to your dad about financial issues… are you able to help out?…. and as per unpredictable weather, that sucks 🙁

My mom told me that her mother (my grandmother) might not come to our wedding (its 4.5 hours away from where she lives) because she doesn’t want to leave her 3 cats Foot in Mouth

Uhmmmm…. ok?

Also, my dad told my mom that he doesn’t want to walk me down the aisle/have a first dance with me becuase he doesn’t like being up in front of everyone and being embarassed.

The grandmother thing I am not too concerned about.. you like your cats more than me? Cool. I’ll send you some pictures I guess.

My dad thing? I am going to tell him that is he doesn’t walk me down the asile/dance with me it will be MUCH MORE EMBARASSING because everyone will ask him why he didn’t.

Post # 12
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Yes it’s normal to be upset when people can’t make it. I also agree the best person to talk to about this is your Dad. As for your grandmother cut her some slack. It is incrdibily difficult for older folks to get around and travel like they used too. My grandpa is very old and while his mind is sharp is body isn’t. He missed quite a few of his grandchildrens weddings due to the fact that they were out of state. It takes a massive toll on his body.

Post # 13
Member
862 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You’re allowed to be upset as long as you’re not upset at them.  You will just have to be understanding about your grandmother’s situation, but I would talk to your father and find out for sure what’s going on there.  Perhaps you could help pay for your father’s travel expenses and that might make it possible for him to come after all?  My husband and I are disappointed that his brother, his sister-in-law, and his nephew could not come to our wedding (especially since they were all supposed to be in the bridal party), but they live in another province and my husband’s sister-in-law was diagnosed with breast cancer a month before the wedding.  My husband is especially disappointed because they had to miss out on all the family photos and it’s the first time that his family would have been together in over a decade.  It really sucks when close family can’t make it to a wedding, but it’s just one of those things that we have to accept and try to be gracious about.  I’m sorry you have to go through it too.

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