(Closed) Am I being a brat? Mom got engaged at my engagement party

posted 2 years ago in Parties
Post # 31
9435 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Yikes that’s pretty tacky.

At least it wasn’t at your wedding?

Post # 32
1754 posts
Buzzing bee

You’re not being a brat. YOUR ENGAGEMENT party is supposed to be about YOUR ENGAGEMENT. Maybe you can announce your pregnancy at their wedding.

Post # 33
3867 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

jazandlo :  How embarrassing for your mom! I woudl have killed Darling Husband if he proposed to me at the ENGAGEMENT party of someone else, especially without running it by them first. Yikes. I don’t think you are being a brat, but I do think that now it’s done, you should drop it. Your feelings are absolutely warranted, but I’m not sure what is to be gained by telling your mom or her Fiance that you are unhappy with what they did. I just feel like it has the ability to sour their engagement or make it a subject that can’t be discussed.

If it were me, I’d be irritated to boot, but I’d let it go. It’s not like he can keep doing this, and I don’t see something like this happening again.

Post # 35
994 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

nope, i’d be upset too.

If your mom’s (now FI) wanted to propose to her at an event being held in your honour for your wedding, he should have run it by you first…

actually I hope he ran the proposal by you first anyway since you’re her child.


*editing for spelling errors due to the lag that plagues this site

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 5 months ago by  lmo013.
Post # 36
439 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

jazandlo :  brat? Nope. I think anyone would feel the way you did and do. That being said smiling and nodding is probably the best approach, so pat yourself on the back. I won’t let it bother you and would try to shake it off. You have bigger things to enjoy! Focus on those fun things!! 🙂

If it helps at all… During one friend’s graduation dinner from high school, the family discussed her sister’s wedding and the sister got engaged a few weeks earlier. No “we are so proud you graduating near the very top of the class while working 35+ hours a week to basically support yourself and being a state champion debater which got you a full ride to college”. Same older sister, same friend… announced her pregnancy at friend’s college graduation party. And at my mom’s engagement party is when my aunt announced she was pregnant because “well, everyone was there!”. She did it right after the welcome speech and toast my grandfather gave. My mom thought her older sister had a toast… nope. Do we laugh about it? Yes. But neither holds a grudge. 

Post # 37
2333 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Are you just going to say lol to anyone that disagrees with you? Real mature 

Post # 38
1747 posts
Bumble bee

Another bee that would be totally miffed, but agree with others to keep it to yourself. Was the timing insensitive? Sure – but it wasn’t your mom’s fault, and I would be super embarassed for your mom, too. I’d be mortified if my SO used another persons celebration to get everyone together for a public proposal. *virtual hugs* Congratulations on your engagement!!! 

Post # 39
8833 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

jazandlo :  What do you think you’ll gain from talking to them about it? It’s not going to change anything and it most certainly will not make things better going forward. 

He was accidentally a taint. Don’t deliberately be a taint back. That makes you the bigger taint.

Post # 40
3446 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

I agree with SoniaRen2 :  . I certainly don’t think proposals have to be some over the top flash mob event, but he didn’t make it his own moment and that’s what makes it lazy. 

Post # 42
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

Lol at all the people saying they would think its wonderful and they would be so happy if that happened to them. Well,  it didn’t happen to you so that’s irrelevant. I would be annoyed because the boyfriend didn’t ask first or mention it at all. Obviously OP is happy for them but she has a right to be annoyed and I think it’s hard to say how anyone would react unless it happens to them. 

Post # 43
9595 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

That is at best a tone deaf mistake and at worst just crazy!!

Post # 44
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I think it’s pretty rude to do. But I would just critique the timing a bit with my fiancé later. If my mom got proposed to (she’s divorced) I would be so happy for her, finally she wouldn’t be alone. It happened and there’s nothing that can be done about that, so why not lose the negativity and see the good in what happened?

Post # 45
527 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

kristin36890 :  HAHAHHA, this would be something I would do!

OP: Definitely not a brat, I’d be furious and would probably bring it up if it was me (however, I don’t recommend that as the best course of action).

The topic ‘Am I being a brat? Mom got engaged at my engagement party’ is closed to new replies.

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