Post # 91
I think that madating heels with a long dress is a bit much. You really wont see them. I don’t wear heels often because I too would tower over my Fiance so as a result don’t walk in them very well. I think you should also take into consideration that if she doesn’t wear heels often you might actually be better off letting her stick to the flats. If not ask her if she could wear heels for just the ceremony.
Post # 92
Yes, you’re being a bridezilla. You get to request that your bridesmaids dress a certain way, but not require. She heard your request and told you she won’t do it. Some people physically can’t walk in heels. And short girls don’t know what it feels like to be the behemoth in the room, so don’t put that discomfort on her. Let your bridesmaid wear what she wants on her feet – in a long dress and flats, I can pretty much promise you no one will even notice her shoes.
Post # 93
For those posters *still* posting that you’re a bridezilla
1. Short dress. Not full length.
2. Not requesting a heel, requesting a nice looking shoe.
3. Offered to buy shoes.
Honestly, I’d be very irritated. I want everyone to look nice, and if my BMs decided to wear scuffed tennies they mow their lawn in – I’d be irritated. I agree that you can just buy her nice, basic flats of the same style that she’s insisting on, and ask she wear those for the pictures, then go back to her cruddy ones for after. I have no idea why substituting a nicer looking pair of shoes is such a big deal to her.
Post # 94
You are being very reasonable op. Tell her and her husband to get over their height phobias. Nice new flat or she can’t walk down the aisle. That’d be my answer to her childlike crap.
Post # 95
People need to f’ing read before they respond…
You’re not being unreasonable. If it was me, she wouldn’t be walking down the aisle or in pics with those nasty shoes on. It’s just disrespectful and rude. You’ve offered to buy her a new pair of flats, there’s little else you can do. Clearly her and her husband have some issues regarding his height… Is he also in the wedding party? What pics does she think they are having taken together??
Post # 96
I have flat feet and can’t stand to wear high heels. Some people have feet problems.
Post # 97
- Wedding: October 2013 - Dalhousie Castle
I don’t think you are being a bridezilla. I got my two maids to wear the exact shoe I picked out! It’s only for one day, they can suck it up, especially if the cost is not outrageous.
Post # 98
- Wedding: October 2013 - Dalhousie Castle
Thank you for writing that. I don’t know why asking for certain shoes is a big deal at all, especially if they are going to show. After all, when agreeing to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man would you not expect to be asked to wear a dress and heels, barring medical issues that might prevent it?
Lets all be honest. At a wedding the guests are all looking to see what the bride and BMs are wearing. If one comes down the aisle in scruffy old shoes it’s not great. Especially if a lot of effort was put into the day to make it gorgeous.
Post # 99
How on earth does this make you a bridezilla? I don’t even know why your Bridesmaid or Best Man would WANT to wear shitty old flats. I love having an excuse to get new shoes. As a Bridesmaid or Best Man, it’s your job to make the brides life easier. Easier does not entail fighting over some old shoes. Like, really where is this girl’s head?? I wore heels to my sister’s wedding as a Bridesmaid or Best Man and I walk like a newborn giraffe in heels but she wanted me in them so I did it.
Stand your ground and insist she wear nicer flats. My Fiance is picky about me wearing heels too because he isn’t that tall but you’re letting her wear flats! Gah. I am sorry for that frustrating situation!
Post # 100
Exactly! My girls have already asked what dress/shoes/jewelry/hair etc they should expect to need to have/do, and were pleasantly surprised to find out they just need to look nice lol. If I were the Bridesmaid or Best Man, I would fully expect to have to wear certain things, and barring any medical issues or complete immodesty, those things would be worn! If I were at the wedding and noticed that one Bridesmaid or Best Man decided to wear something scruffy, I would bet that the women (at least) around me would have noticed as well.
Perhaps she doesn’t want to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man anymore, or is otherwise projecting something she’s uncomfortable about onto the strange issues of shoes? It’s the only semi-logical explanation for the BM’s rather childish behavior. :/