(Closed) Am I being awful?

posted 6 years ago in Money
Post # 3
3969 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@abeenonymous:  If Fiance wants to take a trip, he should at least be able to pay his half, IMO.

Post # 4
47 posts
  • Wedding: May 2012

I agree with your mother.  It might also be a little irresponsible of your Fiance to want to take a a trip when he has no money to contribute towards it?  I don’t think you should be feeling guilty when you had the foresight to keep money in savings for situations like this (i.e. no job).  Wish our savings would grow faster!  🙂

Post # 6
312 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m sorry, but I agree.

I don’t think you should feel guilty about not wanting to spend your hard earned savings on a trip that your Fiance wants to take.

Is it a special occasion or is it “just because”?

$2000 is not a hugely expensive trip and you could afford to do it considering how much you have saved, but on the principle that you’re currently unemployed and have no prospects for the immediate future, I don’t think a trip is necessary at the moment.

Perhaps if Fiance could contribute something to the trip, rather than just expect you to pay for it all, that would be a bit more palettable.

Post # 8
1077 posts
Bumble bee

@abeenonymous:  Tell Fiance you can go on a bigger trip when you guys are more stable. It’s understandable to want to get away, but pouting about not being able to is pretty childish. You are not being awful, you’re being smart!

Post # 9
46 posts
  • Wedding: October 2014

In my opinion, I feel your Fiance should have to cover some costs as he is asking you to go into your savings to pay for everything.

Post # 10
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i hate to say flat out no because if you are both really needing a time out to relax and recharge then i dont think $2K is much but i would be happier if your Fiance comes up with his share of the funds to finance this then i would consider it but it cant be a free ride for him

its perfectly ok for one person to cover the cost of a couple trip but there has to be a lot of give and take and sharing first.  in our home i usually pay for all our vacations but i also have never seen a household/mortgage/medical bill etc in years because my hubby pays those

oh, i also suggest not discussing finances and Fiance with your mom too much – this is the sort of stuff that gives her a really bad impression on your Fiance and could cause drama later on

Post # 11
1002 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

This is a choice that only you can make, but if it was me, I would not spend $2000 on a trip if I did not have a job and Fiance was broke. I’m also the type of person who hates spending money, so if I did not have money coming in, I would not be able to justify spending that amount of cash.

ETA: What if you took a small trip somewhere for a couple nights and just spent a couple hundred? At least you could get away and have some fun without spending a ton of money.

Post # 14
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I agree with your mother. These are your savings, and with no job, you need to keep it there. Anything could happen!

Post # 15
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I disagree, If he’s your Fiance and he wants/needs a vacation and you have a significant amount of money in savings, then I say spend the $2,000.00 You love him. He spent his hard earned money on a ring to make you his Fiance, it would be nice of you to do something nice for him.

If this vacation was going to put you in financial distress, i would agree on it being irresponsible; but it’s clearly not, so enjoy the time away together!

Post # 16
1026 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I would take him on a trip. Its small in comparison with your savings. with your savings it seems very stable imo. mariage is give and take with money, if at some point you have less money than him Im sure he would do the same.

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