(Closed) Am I being childish? Please help Hive….

posted 11 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Am I being childish?

    Yes

    No

    Other (comment below)

  • Post # 17
    Member
    2 posts
    Wannabee

    I can understand being a little upset, but being “childish” comes into play when you can’t accept that just because you’re upset about something doeesn’t necessarily mean someone else’s behavior has to change.  It also means understanding that being upset about something small does not have to mean causing big problems in a relationship.  The fact that you are getting married is great for celebrating relationships that are important in your life.  But we have to keep in mind that those relationships don’t necessarily become less important just because a friend can’t jump through a hoop.  Other relationships still exist for the people in your life.  And people won’t stop being forgetful or even occassionaly inconsiderate just because we’re getting married.

    Post # 18
    Member
    3330 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    That sucks, but I would try to move past it a bit. I was super giddy when my best friend first got engaged. Your Maid/Matron of Honor just might be on a bit of a friend-engagement high and she forgot about your guys’ plans. It definitely sucks, but it’s not the end of the world! I’d just forgive her and move on. 

    Post # 19
    Member
    105 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I would be pretty pissed if I asked a friend to do something and then they planned to do it with someone else. Hope it all works out!

    Post # 20
    Member
    4831 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Honestly when people say “hey lets go see a movie on x date” over a week in advance, those plans are almost always tentative.

    I’m of the mindset of, the more the merrier. Now it’s a double celebration with double the congratulations.

    Plus, it’s just a night out. Like another PP said, it’s not like she’s trying to make your bachelorette party her bachelorette party too!

    Post # 21
    Member
    1925 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I personally would be kinda upset too… I don’t think the movie has anything to do with it. If I asked one of my bridesmaids to go see a movie with me (or anything for that matter) and she said yes, then she makes plans with someone else (bride to be or not) and asked me if I wanted to tag along, I would indeed feel a little hurt and be a bit upset.

    Post # 22
    Member
    726 posts
    Busy bee

    lol it’s a movie which she invited you to so she wasn’t blowing you off! And you said yourself that you couldn’t completely remember if you asked her. It also not like you had plans for the two of you to hang out. You are bringing a whole bunch of other people AND you’ll be sitting in a dark theater where no one will be talking. If you had a day set out then keep it and tell her about it. My friend saw it and said it was sooo funny that your Maid/Matron of Honor may want to see it twice. lol I wouldn’t be too upset about it.

    OR maybe she did remember and the girl said she wanted to see it too so your Maid/Matron of Honor was trying to make it work so she wouldn’t have to go twice. If you need to be upset give it a few hours and then move on.

     

    Post # 24
    Member
    110 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    Wow you are being very sensitive.  It’s not a shower or bachelorette party.   Honestly, you asked the forum, and I have to say Let it Go.

     

     

    Post # 25
    Member
    994 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I can relate to how you feel because I am the type of person where if something is mentioned once I assume it is set in stone and everyone knows its happening.  My Fiance and some of my friends are they type that if we haven’t set a specific time and date for something it doesn’t register to them.  This has caused a lot of hurt feeling and I’ve felt blown off because of it.  My advice is just to let it go and try and have fun at the movie.  It might take some adjustment of expectations but try not to to take it personally.

    Post # 26
    Member
    28 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    You’re story is funny only because it’s the whole plot of the movie you are about to see!

    Post # 27
    Member
    539 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    i chose “other” because i don’t know your Maid/Matron of Honor history.  I’ve had friends that constantly flaked on me and that’s why im no longer friends with them.  if this is a chronic problem with her, then i can understand why you’re upset.  however, if this is an isolated incident, then i’d just suck it up.

    Post # 28
    Member
    74 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I don’t think it sounds like your plans with you Maid/Matron of Honor were firm so its understandable in the exitment she’s forgotton and now trying to find a compromise without upsetting either of her newly engaged friends.

    Saying that, i would be annoyed about it internally because its different to what I had planned but I wouldn’t show it because deep down I’d know that it was a bridezilla moment.

    Someone else said this which I keep having to remind myself.

    As a bride, you get a day for your wedding and a day for a hen! Not the monopoly on all your bridals parites free time for the 2 years running up to the wedding! Its hard to accept but when your in your friends position you’l see.

    Post # 29
    Member
    361 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    It is just a movie, but I would be a bit annoyed if I’d asked a friend to do something, they agreed and then planned something else with someone else (whether it was the same activity or not). But- it’s not a big deal really so just go with it- go along and enjoy it! If it keeps happening, then get annoyed!

    Post # 30
    Member
    100 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    It seems you’re more bothered with the idea of sharing your friend with this other bride than the fact that she forgot about having made movie plans with you beforehand.  It’s quite possible that in her excitement for the other bride she inadvertantly forgot about the movie plans.  Let it go – it doesn’t seem as though your Maid of Honor is doing this on purpose to upset you.  It all seems innocent enough.  Perhaps it might be nice for you to meet the other bride and go as a large group to watch the movie.  Who knows, you both might be able to share and bounce wedding ideas off of each other.  Take it easy 🙂

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