(Closed) Am I being controlling or concerned?

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
Member
558 posts
Busy bee

You have a deadline – the end of the year. Just wait.

Post # 3
Member
1405 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2005 - A Castle

Controlling. 

Post # 4
Member
3212 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

View original reply
AngelWingz:  why did your mom call you and not him? She should call him about the diamonds and can mention the timeline it takes then. That leaves you completely out of it.

Post # 5
Member
4297 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Just let him do it. He’s a big boy.

Post # 6
Member
882 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
AngelWingz:   I think you’re being unintentionally controlling. It’s so close to the end of the year, just wait it out. Just do your best and try to trust that he will get things done on time, and if it gets past your deadline then have a discussion. step away from talking about the ring and wedding to the people that know anything about the situation, and keep yourself busy for the next little bit

Post # 7
Member
2445 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think it’s a little controlling. Do you trust him? Is he a capable person? There’s still time left and unless you’ve talked specifically about what to do with the ring, I don’t think you can be fully sure of what he’s planning. Guys can surprise you. Agreed with PP about your mom calling you.. she should be calling him! I’m sure he’ll figure it all out. Try not to stress.

Post # 8
Member
5019 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

Definitely do not bring it up.  The ball is in his court now.  Keep your promise by keeping silent.

Post # 9
Member
1980 posts
Buzzing bee

Let him do it. Either he’ll stick to his word, or he won’t. Let him show you. If the deadline passes, then you can decide if you want to have to badger someone to propose to you. But wait it out.

Post # 10
Member
640 posts
Busy bee

Yeah you’re being controlling. Trust him on this and wait and see what happens. I know , easier said than done but if I was him I’d be annoyed with you breathing down my back. The proposal isn’t just about you.

Post # 11
Member
7367 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Relax, he can handle it himself. Controlling. 

Post # 13
Member
893 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Well, the “traditional” part is out the window since you planned it together, but whatever.  I’d be surprised if he actually had a ring for you at the end of the year.

Post # 14
Member
323 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

View original reply
AngelWingz:  I know it’s tough, but try to wait it out. Worst case scenario is he doesn’t understand the turnaround time and you get engaged a few weeks later. I know it’s hard to keep the excitement and anxiety in check, but are those few weeks really worth extra stess on your relationship? Try to relax and let him handle it.

Post # 15
Member
2849 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

I just want to say that you sound EXACTLY how I would be in this situation, and I admit I am super controlling… its hard! But honestly, how do you think he’s going to react if you bring it up? It’s not gonna go well.. hes gonna be annoyed. The last thing you want right now if him having any negative thoughts associated with him proposing. 

I reallllly think you shouldn’t say anything until after the timeline deadline and if he still hasnt proposed THEN bring it up. If you guys agreed that your timeline was till the end of the year then you owe it to him to respect that. Good luck!

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