(Closed) Am I being oversensitive?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1458 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I don’t think you’re being ridiculous, I think having a “second wedding” is treading the line between okay and silly, but then having pre-second wedding events that are traditionally before REAL weddings? Absolutely ridiclous.

Post # 4
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

“I feel like my other cousins girlfriend is projecting all of her wedding fantasies onto my cousins wife and is now going to, for the lack of a better term, rain all over my parade with wedding festivities for an already married woman.”

Exactly. This woman isn’t getting married anytime soon, so she’s taking advantage of this opportunity to plan the wedding she may never have. You are not being oversensitive.

Not sure from your post what your relationship is with the male cousin- can you talk to him about this? They’ll be having a family reunion at your wedding- I’m sorry, but two years after the first wedding? Unless there was a situation such a someone was deployed/in another country the whole time, etc.- this is too late. What does your aunt think of all of this?

Post # 6
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

If your cousin’s wife doesn’t even really want to do the second wedding, she really might not be on board with a bridal shower and bachelorette party. I can see her going along with the ceremony and reception to humor her husband, but she might put her foot down about the other events. It doesn’t sounds like your other cousin’s girlfriend has totally confirmed the shower and party with the wife, and when she brings it up, the wife may very well give her a reality check on it.

Post # 7
Member
580 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My opinion may not be popular, but I am just going to put it out there that I think “second” weddings are pretty ridiculous…you’re already married! No, I don’t think you are being oversensitive at all…I hate it when people do stuff like that…that being said, they were wrong for trying to piggyback on your wedding weekend, but I’m sure there was no malice intended. Sometimes people just don’t think! Wink

Post # 8
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Just write a note to the girlfriend, expressing your thoughts.  She’s so overeager, she’s oblivious and likely doesn’t mean to upset you.  (And yes, a shower for a 2 year old wedding is not in good taste, although I can understand a bachelorette/gals weekend better.)  That said, you can’t expect the weekend to be allabout you.  I’m happily giving the limelight on Friday to my uncle for his birthday (although he’s trying to dodge it rumor has it.)

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