Am I being selfish?

posted 6 months ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
3863 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

springlakebride :  Will you be going to the hotel at any point? My home is 40 mins from my venue but we’ll be staying at the hotel the night before the wedding and getting ready there that day, so I’m just having everyone come to my hotel room to get ready. I don’t think 30 mins is a tall ask, but it would be a little silly to have them travel to you, then travel back to the hotel again if you’re able to just go there to get ready. Ultimately, it’s only 30 mins. It won’t kill anyone. Just do what will make your day run the smoothest. 

Post # 3
Member
7094 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I don’t think 30m is that big of a deal, but some things to consider – if they are not local, will they have a car/ability to GET to you? Where is the venue? It might be easier for you go to the hotel if the venue is closer to there? 

If you only want to get ready at your house I think that’s fine, but I would give them an “out” if its too inconveneint for them to get there, so they can just get ready at the hotel together. 

Post # 4
Member
1614 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018 - Location

You can always offer/invite them, but tell them it’s not obligatory. 

Will they have a rental car to get from the hotel to your house? How far is your venue from these locations? 

Post # 7
Member
3863 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

springlakebride :  Oh yeah, well in that case, do what’s easiest for you! Maybe they can carpool to your place. 

Post # 8
Member
7484 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

springlakebride :  what is the timeline like? Will they be going directly from your house to the park? And then driving their own cars the whole time? Are they bringing SO who will then need a ride to the ceremony? Or if they are dropped off at your house, will they have a ride to the rest of the events?

I would invite them to your house but also let them know you understand if they choose to have their hair done elsewhere.

Post # 9
Member
539 posts
Busy bee

So really they will be traveling 50 mins to your house so they can drive 30 mins back to the venue detouring the park in the way if the park is in the way to the hotel and then drive 20 mins at the end of the night back to the hotel.

the non local ones will be driving 2 hours extra on that day.

I agree with PP invite them but give them an option to meet you at the park for first look and pics.  

Post # 10
Member
12528 posts
Honey Beekeeper

springlakebride :  You can offer them the option, but cannot obligate your bridesmaids to get hair and makeup done at your home, or professionally, whether or not you pay. In your SIL’s place I’d probably find someplace or someone  closer to the hotel or DIY. 

Post # 11
Member
8859 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I don’t understand really, why would you want them to be driving about at all. Why can they not be done at the easiest place for them …?…

Post # 12
Hostess
8962 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

elderbee :  Some people find it exciting and special to get ready with their bridal party. 

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