- 7 years ago
- Wedding: July 2011
Sorry so long, but I have no idea whether I’m overreacting or if this is standard wedding planner practice:
I’m getting married in the end of July, right after my state bar exam. Anyone who knows someone who has taken the bar understands that the 3 months leading up to it, basically the person is MIA. Unfortunately, timing just worked out this way and the wedding had to be then. With this knowledge, i KNEW that I needed a wedding planner.
I hired someone who had about 20 reviews on weddingwire.com. I admit when I met with the planner, I went by myself and I came across as desperate for some needed help. Well, long story short, she sold me her most expensive package ($6000+). She is the most paid vendor (besides the venue) that I have. At that meeting, I stressed the fact that I do want to be involved, and therefore, I’d prefer that most of the wedding decisions be decided by the end of April. I hired her in January.
Since then, I feel like I’ve done mostly everything. Maybe it’s not clear to me what a planner’s role is in the pre-wedding months. Is she supposed to stay on top of my to-do list?
Below is a list of what she has done, and what I have done. I’d love to hear your opinions/comments on whether I’m being taken advantage of (i.e., planner sits back and makes me do all the work while she’s getting a huge payday in the end).
To date, the planner has:
– helped me find and negotiate a venue
– arranged hotel accommodations at 2 hotels
I did the following tasks, mostly without any input from the planner despite having asked for vendor recommendations:
– booked photographer
– booked hair and makeup
– booked officiant
– booked florist
– booked invitations, save-the-dates, papergoods
– booked honeymoon
– and worried myself over all the countless other minor wedding tasks
I have not heard from her in about 3 weeks, and she knows that I will be unavailable starting at the end of the month. The next time I’ll be seeing her is the day before the wedding. Shouldn’t she be thinking of things I need to get done or at least asking me if I’ve gotten certain tasks completed? (things I wouldn’t think of since i’m a first-time bride).
I could confront her about this, but I’m worried on how to broach the subject. I want to preserve good relations with her, or else what if she doesn’t exert much effort on the day of? I’m also wondering if I even needed to book the most expensive package (which according to her, she would handle everything up to the day after the wedding and I wouldn’t need to worry about anything). Another note, I’m located in Florida and the wedding planner and wedding location is in New Jersey.
Sorry for the long rant-like question! Any advice or past experience would be appreciated!!