(Closed) Am I Being Unreasonable?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
875 posts
Busy bee

It doesn’t sound like she’s really interested in hosting the shower.  (I’ve been on the flip side of this issue having once been a Maid/Matron of Honor hosting the bride’s hometown shower, one that she could only come up with one day out of the whole summer to come home because she was busy at the “lake house”.)  Those lake houses must be interesting places… as for me… I’d rather go to the beach!  LOL

Post # 5
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Don’t let her get you bent out of shape about it.  Maybe she doesn’t think of it as a priority, or realize how important it is to you that she be there.  Just enjoy your party with those who will be there to celebrate with you!

Post # 6
523 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think its weird that she suggested having the shower, is now not hosting the shower, and to top it off is now not even sure she will attend..sounds like this is not a priority for her, so I think you should continue with the plans you have…if she comes then GREAT! If not, have a great time with the people that cared enough to be there…

Post # 7
2641 posts
Sugar bee

I’m curious if she’s attending the first shower?  Maybe she feels a little “showered out”.  Or if she isn’t attending, perhaps she is contributing money to the first shower, and again, is a money issue.

I’m like you.  I think i’d move mountains to try to be there for my friend.  I put friends really high up on my list.  I have a friend who does a lot of family group vacations.  Whenver I try to get a meet up planned (all of our group is scattered about), she always has a family weekend thing.  I keep thinking, can’t she skip this one event to meet up with us?   We only get together like once every few years, now.  But alas, some people just aren’t like us.

A couple of devil’s advocate thoughts. 1) Is it possible that Bridesmaid or Best Man isn’t getting along with Future Mother-In-Law, and that’s why she seems uninterested now, whereas before was interested?  Perhaps she felt like Future Mother-In-Law just took over?  2)Perhaps Bridesmaid or Best Man had this one weekend to get everyone to the lake house, and outside of that was pretty much open.  While Future Mother-In-Law had nothing open but the one weekend.  (I know I’d be miffed if I had just one date that didn’t work and the other host had only one date that did work, and I was the one who had to move things around.)  3)  Do you know the details of the lake house?  Are there other people going who your Bridesmaid or Best Man has’t seen in a while?  If this is a “one of many” type of event, I can see being upset.  But if this is a pretty rare family event, then I think it’s possible that the event legitimately trumps your shower.

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