- 8 years ago
- Wedding: September 2010
I need your advice, Bees!
Alright, so as some of you might know from my previous posts… my Fiance is unemployed. He has been unemployed, without a FT job w/benefits, etc., for almost 1.5 years now. During the summer months, he works off the books at a golf club, caddying. Last summer, he did this.. and he will be back at it this summer.
While the $ is good because he brings in cash, in my eyes, it’s not a “real”job. I work, FT and have since I graduated from college. I am happy that he will at least be out of the apartment and working, but part of me is worried that this is going to become a pattern over the years. Yes, he has been applying to jobs, but nothing has resulted… in large part due to the fact that he won’t settle for any job, but just a job in his area of expertise.
He keeps telling me not to worry and that things will be OK. And while I am happy that he says that, I can’t help but begin to think… he said the same words to be a year ago and here we are in the same position.
We’re getting married in the Fall, and planning a wedding is $$ – as you know. So, right now, the cash will be good and helpful.
But… maybe this is me just being super “girly” but I can’t help but worry about the near future. I want to have a baby soon – in the next couple of years, and I just don’t see how the situation we’re in will allow for us to do that. He tells me to stay confident, but the problem is that I have been and nothing has changed. Perhaps the pessimist in me is showing, but I’m just freaking out because what I want for our life in the near future just seems so far away.
I love him more than anything and would never leave him because of the situation we’re in, but I need to vent… and I feel like he is beginning to think I am going “girl crazy” on him. He just doesn’t understand – truly – where I’m coming from. He thinks in the moment – which is good, don’t get me wrong – but I am thinking more long term and am getting frustrated.
Does any of this make sense?