Post # 1

Member
944 posts
Busy bee
So we are planning a smaller wedding–like 50-60 people. No DJ, nothing big. No grand decorations by a florist, no fancy steak dinner (but we are serving dinner at the reception), and just more of a relaxed kind of wedding. We were actually lucky to find the place we did because it’s costing us under $1,000 for 8 hours and includes tables and chairs. It’s a beautiful location–which we can get our deposit back if we want. However, due to the economy (as you all know very well) it sucks. My parents are hoping to be able to keep their jobs and my fiance and I have already been handed 10-14 furlough days between now and late next year and my fiance also is having to take a 2.25% pay cut. Another thing you need to know, my family is graciously helping to pay for the wedding and so are the Fiance and I. My Fiance and I just bought a house (that is well within our means and didn’t overspend) due to his job he got several months ago. We love our home and even if we were saving for a wedding things would be fine, but with the above mentioned cuts things might be a little tight now.
Here’s my problem: I am wondering if we should cut down the wedding even more so all of us aren’t stressing to save for a wedding. I also don’t want to put down a deposit on something and then lose that money because we can’t afford it later on.
Then I start to feel a little sad. We had such a hard time trying to find a venue that was even in our budget. I think I searched everywhere in our area and everything was way more than we could afford. Our photographer is our big spend at $1,500 and I also wonder if spending that much now is ridiculous. Am I being a bit of a whiny b*tch because I feel like our wedding day won’t be “nice” enough? People tell me to focus on what the day actually means, that the Fiance and I get married. Of course that’s what is most important to me! That’s what I want most of all. The ceremony actually has me more excited than looking for a dress. But if we cut back even more to the bare bones I’m afriad it’ll feel like our wedding day was not a big deal. My sister got married in July ’08 and it was a big day for them and I want the same thing for us, not some picnic food for a reception and the day over in a snap. I’m not sure what to do! My hopes and dreams for our wedding day isn’t unpractical—I want a beautiful day that reflects my Fiance and I. Yes, some people can afford an extravagant wedding (and more power to them if they can afford it), but I’ve never wanted to go that route in the first place.
Also, the option of pushing the day farther away isn’t going to happen either. We aren’t getting married until Labor Day weekend of 2010 so that’s far enough as it is.
Am I being a snotty b*tch about our wedding day and how it will pan out or do you have some suggestions?
Post # 3

Member
296 posts
Helper bee
I think you are being very conscientious and in no way snotty or whiny. You have a right to be concerned with the financial times we face. I think you should not skimp on the photographer because I have read everywhere that is the area to spend your money on. Your photos will last forever while the wedding is one day. Could you have a smaller wedding with less people possibly? Then when times improve have a big party?
Post # 4

Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
You are not being whiney at all. All of your concerns are very legitimate and I think anyone on here planning a wedding could totally relate.
If you’re concerned about finances, personally, I don’t think that photography or the venue is a good place to cut costs. Things that are easy to cut? Flowers, DJ, favors, decor, etc.
For example, we splurged and got the venue and photographer of our dreams, and we cut back on everything else. We had an iPod wedding and no DJ, we did our own centerpieces (candles) and only bought bouquets and bouts for the wedding party, we got a very small cake to cut that was decorated how we wanted, and served a variety of other (less expensive) desserts, etc. We were able to stay in our budget, and we still had a wedding that looked a lot more expensive than it was.
Post # 5

Member
348 posts
Helper bee
In this economy, so many brides are in the same boat as you. Thats why we started to look at a destination wedding. Also, we started saving a little bit each month, when we got to about $400 we started breaking it up into Cd’s at the bank. Cd’s that we couldnt touch until 30 days before the wedding and we can continue to add money too along with the interest the bank is putting in. We did a Cd for each major vendor (Cd for travel & airfare, CD for photography, CD for food, CD for dress and attire, etc.)
Interest rates right now are amazing, especially at credit unions if your apart of one. Def something to look into.
It certainly sets my mind at ease.
Post # 6

Member
599 posts
Busy bee
I actually think interest rates are pretty terrible right now… but every little bit helps and CU’s are one of the better places to get good rates. My husband and I each had a 10% pay cut this year for the entire time we were planning the wedding, but we still managed. I think you’re far enough out that if you just buckle down, cut all discretionary spending, and save save save you can pull off your wedding!
Post # 7

Member
343 posts
Helper bee
No, not snotty or whiny at all! Weddings are a big deal to a lot of people. Sounds like you got an amazing deal on a venue, so you’re off to a great start. I agree that photographer is probably not the best way to cut costs — especially if it’s important to you. I am on a strict budget, and I have found that I would rather have a smaller wedding with everything how I want it.
My best ways to cut costs have been to cut the guest count, DIY projects… and the most effective way I’ve found… choose the things that you really care about, do them how you want to, and forget the stuff you don’t care about.
Post # 8

Member
944 posts
Busy bee
Thanks ladies! Considering that our budget right now is at $7,000 I’m not sure we can really go any smaller. We are already trying to feed people dinner that costs under $13, we are doing the iPod route, having dessert made by friends/family and flowers aren’t going to be a big part except for my bouquet (and if I even have BMs still). To me I’m amazed that things have been cut and we still manage to hit $7,000. It’s insane! Part of me wonders if we should just have a light lunch or something, but that still involves finding a caterer who can provide something other than turkey sandwiches. I know they have to make a living too but I’m not paying $25 for rubberized chicken drenched in herbs that I could make far cheaper on my own–and don’t have the time to do.
I know everyone is going through this too. I just am at the point where I don’t know if we can really even cut anything since we’ve already cut out the big stuff—florist doing flowers (doing my own), big centerpieces (got beautiful Ball jars for FREE that I’ll fill with whatever flowers I can find at the grocery store), cut out china for place settings and will just use thick paper plates, no bakery cake—doing desserts made by others. Just boggles my mind.
Thank you very much for the support.