Am I mean that I want to upgrade my ring

posted 1 year ago in Rings
Post # 16
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2020

Beth7210 :  I’m with Sonya.  Tell him what a great choice he made and how much you love it and for your first anniversary you want to get re-engaged and get a “slightly” larger stone and by him a men’s dress ring with a diamond (or a great watch) as a gift for your first anniversary.  You should suggest that you both propose to each other at a nice romantic dinner.  Hope this helps!  

Post # 17
Member
423 posts
Helper bee

Whatever you do, talk it through with your man first. I know a guy who was super hurt when his wife went out to the jewelry store to upgrade her own ring without telling him. He says he would have been happy to upgrade for an anniversary but she never told him until she’d already done it. 

Post # 18
Member
276 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Beth7210 :  I don’t think it’s “mean”, but I do believe it would be better to wait it out until an anniversary, and upgrade then. Mine is .7 carat and it doesn’t look very small. I’m sure your ring looks amazing. 

Also, maybe .75 is what he is able to afford. I think you should look at the bigger picture instead of focusing on details. 1 carat won’t look dramatically different. (My mother’s center stone is that big.) I wanted a more dramatic setting like pave, but when I saw my Fi couldn’t afford it, I went with a simple solitaire, and I’m very happy! 

 

I will also add that I believe if you bring-up your concerns now, it may seem like you’re not entirely grateful of what he’s gotten you since it’s only been five months. Give it time, you may grow to really love it. Remember, there are girls out there who are dying to be engaged and/or can’t wait to be in your shoes that they are not even thinking about the specifics. Btw, .75 is not a tiny stone. 

EDIT: I just saw your ring! So stunning! 

Post # 19
Member
234 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

What about changing the ring and adding a halo? Look for a bigger ring for an anniversary not so soon after. But adding to the ring wouldnt be so bad. A small halo could make all the difference! Especially only going up .25. Thats not a huge difference. Just be honest with him. See what he says.

Post # 21
Member
902 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I don’t think it’s mean, but it may hurt his feelings so you should prepare for that possibility.  I also agree with another poster who said wait it out a bit longer, a lot could change and you could end up wanting something even bigger than 1 ct.  I would suggest waiting until your one year anniversary; not necessarily to avoid hurt feelings but also because it will give you time to really do your research and get a true sense of what you want out of a ring.  In the mean time, I’d suggest a ring enhancer!

Post # 22
Member
56 posts
Worker bee

I don’t think its mean but maybe hurt his feeling little bit.   the .75 pear is not looks small as I tried on round shape .75 on 6 1/2 finger size.   Halo will be great idea for show more size 🙂

   Besides, depend on what kind of wedding band you decide will make diffrent too. 

like wrap wedding band show really nice with your stone too.

But if you do talk to him… I will wait till 1st anniversary at least. 😉

Post # 23
Member
85 posts
Worker bee

Beth7210 :  I would wait to do this until after you’re married. 

Post # 24
Member
4568 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Your 0.75 pear looks as big as my 1.5 emerald cut on my larger finger. 

I would let it be for a while, that stone looks really gorgeous on your hand, hold off until your 1st or 5th wedding anni.

Post # 25
Member
291 posts
Helper bee

Wait until after the wedding. It’s too soon to start talking upgrades IMO. 

Post # 26
Member
633 posts
Busy bee

Beth7210 :  I think it’s stunning. I’d pair it with an eternity shared prong band and be on my merry way! 

Post # 27
Member
692 posts
Busy bee

Honestly, a 1 ct stone is not going to look much larger than your 0.75 ct. I don’t think it’s worth it honestly and it’s probably not going to be costing you double the 0.75 ct stone unless the specs are flawless.. imo just upgrade into your ideal size at one go in the future but hold off for now. It’s just way too soon 

Post # 28
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I would wait. This soon could be sending the message that what he gave you isn’t good enough. I personally don’t think .25 carat of bling is worth hurting feelings. Also, you may feel differently later. I wanted to get something bigger at first too, but now have been married for 5 years and the size of my ring is just not on my radar. I now love my ring and am not concerned about size. Perhaps give it a bit of time and see how you feel later.

Post # 29
Member
480 posts
Helper bee

As others have noted, a .25 carat increase will not be very noticeable. Another potential issue is that going up to a full carat will increase the cost significantly. Btw, the size of that pear shaped diamond looks very lovely on your hand… Perfect, actually! How about compensating with an eternity wedding band to add some extra bling?

Post # 30
Member
4523 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

You mentioned that the store has an upgrade policy that allows you to use the cost of your original diamond to upgrade as long as your new diamond is double the value of your original. So if your ring cost 4k it means your new diamond must be at least 8k and it will cost you 4k to upgrade. That’s a lot of money to spend in just five months and your fiancé may not be on board. 

I’d wait a while or consider getting it set in a halo or adding two side diamonds like traps or even rounds to give it more presence. You could also do change it to a blingy band with a solitaire. Jumping from a 75 to a full carat won’t be that noticeable and it sounds like you want noticeable. Upgrading in other ways may give you what you are looking for more. 

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