(Closed) Am I over evaluating the situation?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
646 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

i think you have become an example of what she wants to be. her job and private life seem unstable, so she’s trying to “copy” a life of someone who is more successful instead of doing something on her own. i’m not sure if what she’s doing is “unconscious” or being done on purpose, cos she is insecure and desiring for approval. anyway, if she’s important to you, talk to her about that and try helping her out if you can.

Post # 4
Member
8041 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Tropicalbride:  She sounds like a bit of a nut job. Yeah I am only seeing your side of the story, but I thought most people grew out of this sort of thing by the time they left highschool.

She sounds unstable, jealous, lonely, passive-aggressive, insecure, and just plain weird.

Post # 5
Member
247 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Had the same thing happen but with my older sister; I just chose to be an example to her. Yes it can be emotionally draining but just continue to be the bigger person. It may come off as ‘weird’ to you that she is acting like this but if you have something she desires so much to have herself it’s kind of a compliment in a weird way. She seems very unsatisfied with life which I’d say is more unfortunate than being on the other end of things.

Post # 6
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Tropicalbride:  She needs help! It sounds like she wants to be you. Why don’t you tell her you are getting some counselling and she might get some too….

Post # 7
Member
520 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

she feels insecure about herself and the way her life is going, so one she is overcompensating by telling people that she IS successful, two she tries to follow someone who she thinks is successful (you) to see if that will help her become more like what she wants to be

you getting married just pushed her over the top and making her insecurity come out full force, ie copying you to the t

i wouldn’t be angry at her, she just needs help so her life is more stable and she feels more confident

i think once her life starts getting on track she’ll chill out

Post # 9
Member
1043 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@canarydiamond:  DITTO! 

True, we don’t know her side to this story, but I’m not sure there’s anything she could say to redeem herself.  She sounds like a royal nutcase.

Post # 11
Member
3692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@Tropicalbride:  I’d tell her to take a hike.  She’s nuts.

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