- 4 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
I’ve missed you lately, and it’s been hectic with the wedding in just 9 weeks! (Ah- I can’t believe it!).. Well a few days ago, we had a problem with one of the Groomsmen. Let me start off by saying I have tried really hard to keep my mouth shut, and also make sure FI was happy, and not start anything because afterall; it is someone in the wedding that we truly care about, and want by our side…
So this certain GM, lives in NC, just like us. We offered to have him stay at the same hotel, (Even in the same room- up until the night of the wedding, due to us getting a Bridal Suite, at the venue), during our stay there, AND offer to have him drive with us, to eliminate any extra costs. He started dating this “sweet” girl about two months ago, and I had gotten to know her somewhat well, so FI and I had talked about it, and due to him traveling as far as he was (Wedding is in CT), and not knowing anyone; and agreed to let him know he can bring a guest (knowing he’d bring her- which wasn’t a problem)
A few days had gone by, and I had texted him saying “Hey are you still going to drive up with us for the wedding, or have you arranged something else, due to adding an extra person?” He had replied with “She’s coming”… I had let it go, as I had found that ridiculously rude, and not answering my question; but like I said, for the sake of FI, I just replied with “Awesome! Can’t wait”. The conversation didn’t end there, unfortunately. I had told him that because he WAS in the wedding party; that there were some things we needed to do with him, and that she might have had to stay behind on… (Tux, Rehearsal, Bachelor Party(which would be FI) )… He was NOT feeling that. He replied with “She will be everywhere with me, and that’s the end of it”… I had asked what he meant and he had said “She will be coming to the rehearsal, the rehearsal dinner, the tux pick up, the bachelor AND be with me the morning of the wedding with FI and the other guys”.. I was amazed that someone would even consider that. So I had offered, knowing that she didn’t know a single person there, to let her get ready with my BM’s and I, in the Bridal Suite, just so she didn’t have to drive alone, or be alone the majority of the day. She refused. I tried everything I could, to make them feel as comfortable as possible. He “dropped out” of the wedding because we both were against the idea of her getting ready with the guys the morning of.. We don’t see any reason as to WHY she would have to, when she was provided other options. She said that she HAS to be with him, and that whatever he wants her to do, she will do.. That’s UNHEALTHY. Not okay, and I would NEVER go for that, in a relationship; BUT that is not my business, so I will stay out of that one.
Am I being ridiculous by not wanting her with FI and his GM and BM the morning of, or should I just let her do whatever she wants?! She has also said SHE BETTER walk with him when getting introduced because she does not want him walking in, with another woman… FI is fed up, and these certain GM; hasn’t supported, helped or checked up on the wedding, and has shown no interest, so him dropping out, has it’s pros and cons. I hate for it to be this way, but FI is now hurt because of GM’s actions and that fact that his “Girlfirend, of two months” is now running the show; We’ve been engaged 7 MONTHS.
Please help Bees!!