Am I over reacting?

posted 11 months ago in The Lounge
Post # 31
573 posts
Busy bee

away84691 :  That would’ve been a dealbreaker for me before marriage. That’s the sort of dishonesty that proves he is a person who cannot be trusted. The excuse that “I didn’t tell you because you’d make a big deal about it” is bullshit.

To me, that’s borderline cheating/infidelity. Whether anything happened between them or not, if you have to hide it from your partner, you know you shouldn’t be doing it. 

Post # 33
10460 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

. . . the only reason he lied to me was because I would make a big deal.

That statement says it all, Bee. His lying is your fault.  Do you see how convoluted and dishonest that is? It’s also gaslighting.

This is not a guy willing to take personal responsibility for his own behavior.  That is major, and goes to character.

I suggest getting him out of your life as quickly as possible.  These people don’t get better with a little counseling.  This is who he is, at his core.

Post # 34
438 posts
Helper bee

away84691 :   I would have def made different choices if I can go back

But you can go back.  It’s called divorce.

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